Good afternoon everyone. Happy new Year.
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At times, I feel like deleting my entire blog at once, and then to re-start the thing, after I feel like writing again. I'm at my mother's home, to congrats my family with the new year, as that is A little tradition in this country, at least with my family. I don't know if it's something everywhere.
I didn't have the best off A new year's eve yesterday, first I felt like making mini-pizza-bites, and stuffed apples with cake and A crumble topping as I've seen on Tasty, I had done all the grocery shopping, but looking back on it, my energy drained and I didn't feel like making those yesterday at all, I just had A jar off banana-caramel ice-cream, with caramel sauce and some ice cream waffles for A snack, after my sober meal. I was all by myself, and it just didn't feel- allright with me. I believe the fire works even triggered me somewhat. I rather felt like snoozing on my bed A bit after taking my meds, I had set my alarm for 23:00 yesterday, but I could barely stay awake, so I decided to go as soon back to bed as the fireworks where done. (I have no clue why I couldn't set myself to just giving myself A good time and just celebrate new years eve. I guess it was because I didn't like being all alone that evening.) I got up in time this morning, and decided to go to mom's after taking my morning medication, and getting myself dressed. I had such A haze the previous weeks- in immense desire for A boyfriend. But I think staying single is A better option, given the mental episodes I aolso had yesterday evening. New year's eve was A nasty trigger yesterday. I have voices and projections off nice men comming out off my appartment walls all the time now. I desire to have someone, but I also see how my delusions and my disease can get in the way off A relationship. - You know, I guess I actually DO need someone in my life. It's just that I don't often meet great man for that. It was nothing sexual this time, it was purely- the loss and the triggers that come for me with being on my own for too long. I need company, it's just that- life is not fair if you are truly fair. And that's where I stick with this for now.
I can make the planned bites any evening I wish to have them. cake- stuffed caramel apples are often A good dessert. I'm also about to make cookies for this new year's spiritual ritual endings, and I do so on my own intuïtion, with my own idea off what's fine with that. I had the idea to make cookies today, at the 1st off january, at the pinch point beginning off the new year, but then realized this day would be better spent with family. The cookies I'm about to make come from A cookbook I ordered previous week 'de koekjesbijbel.' And are traditionally named 'Javaantjes.' ('Javanese.') And have A coffee taste with them, I decided to give it my own little twist with the receipe, and cover the bottom off each cookie with chocolate. Many receipes from that book serve at least 40 cookies. It's A well known line off receipe cookbooks ( Translated that book is called 'The cookies-bible.') With A ton off cookie receipes. I like it. If my camera's battery-recharger keeps on being lost, I'm about to buy A new one, if it doesn't show up in my appartment, it's been lost for about A month by now, and I think that sucks because I love to share what I make with people online, and for the great audience on my internet pages to see. Alltough I don't like the idea to be plucked off my ideas by some nasty vultures. I'm about to fight that out later on. But let's start the first blog off this new year A bit more- relaxed.
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Did you know that the planet Uranus has switched positions, from the starsign Aries to the Taurus starsign this year, and that this often means new ideas, new political changes, and often has an impact on our society? I sense it might be A good thing. For me personal, I get the feeling 'sense.' To truly improve my lifestyle, to eat more healthy foods, to experiment more with healthy receipes, to eat more regulated, and start more off A structurated life. I think this is going to help me with the very basics off A responsible, good life- like eating well, sleeping well, and get better groomed- Tauruses are the main starsign which rules these kind off things, and it loves structurated life. which I seem to lack, despite my wish to do my utmost best in life all the time. (But which i'm often not really capable to.)
The last 'Uranus in Taurus.' Transit, was in the deep black period off WWII, but I 'sense' the Bull is very ashamed off that period, and wishes to make A better point off itself. Taurus people often aren't very war- and truly agression driven. It rather wishes to make improvements on the good stuff in life for now, and I have the idea that people should give it A fair chance to do so. It has my support to prove itself well now, and for example improve agriculture and financial basics in life. (I'd be glad if my prediction for it would be accurate for once. But what I state here, is what basic astrology tells about this planet's transition in this starsign and what belongs to it. I'm not sucking it out off my thumb.)
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Allright, this is it for now, hopefully I'll see you back soon.
XXX.-
Maaike.
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