Good evening everyone,
We're in a cooler period in between warm periods, It's breathable but depressingly grey.
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Shabby, clean, a little less giving- buisy with trying to do cheap groceries and the household, I'm trying to handle and fight inflation and my feelings about the war this way. It's for the kitchen honour off a war. But not really. Most Dutch say we're not in an actuall crisis, everything is just darn expensive. Still it works against my good moods. I keep on thinking about all the poor families without food on the table. Very sad. But I can't do anything for them. I need my pennies myself. Sometimes I donate a small amount off money to charity. But not that often. I'm like many a Dutch, sober these days. Honest, I'm not that diffrent from average people in my head. Especially when it has to be more cheap. I'm nothing more or less than most people. Just a simple yet fat girl from the poor part off the country. It's such a discovery how I'm like the rest off them when I have to live cheap.
What I do to try to keep it togheter- to be a little more clean. I got complimented all the time by care staff how my small flat is more clean and tidy. It's a crisis reaction. I feel so good about it when I cleaned something and it's all fresh and smells like lemons. I'm an average clean jerk nowadays. I think I can ditch people over being ungroomed an unhygienic. It's below my cleanline standard nowadays. It may sound a little bit arrogant, but I'm at that point. Cheap, clean, and a little old fashioned. I'm in line with this country. With crisis, actually.
Strange enough I feel less wobbly and more 'on my feet.' when I do that. More sober, more grounded. But also more cranky in an ordinairy way. Fighting the crisis and waging this war my way makes me feel moody. It's also this place, it's vulgair and there's always things going on here. But I handle and deal with it as much as I can. Perfect life is for a princess, I feel too common for that. But man, do I feel good about managing it this way? I would feel proud to have handled it like this, even if we lose this entire Ukraine war, and Gaza falls entirely. It may sound egocentric, but kitchen honour during a war is not so bad, it's better than none. To feel usefull, healthy and fed, and not bankrupt. Oh, and it's not in conflict with the law and institutes off power can't fight me over it. So it's not dangerous. It's a good thing nowadays. It's just that they don't see me as very serious with this. I'm not off might, I outshine that, and they mention. It's not really edgy or fashionable, the calliby cat and Brussle sprout honour off a war. But it's better than doing nothing at all and just be stressed. It feels as if I put my tensions to use, and make people happy with it. It's fullfilling. Spoiled princesses live in a palace, I clean dishes and mind my money. But do I feel it's worthit?
Allright, that's about it for now-
Thank you for reading.
To end this weblog, a picture off tonight's dessert. Low fat strawberry yoghurt with fresh raspberries on top. I ate the entire package off raspberries with this. Just very nice.
