maandag 15 november 2021

Good evening at the 15th off November, 2021.

 Good evening everyone, 


Today it's water cold, gloomy and grey outside. The only diffrence with summer is that it's incredibly cold outside today and for the rest off autumn. It's just as nasty, just a whole lot colder.  


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Personal Story. 

This night I have been awake and baking sand cookies with a squeeze off honey in them. I have been making the dough the day before, I even set my refridgerator two points lower to be sure my dough would be perfectly solid to use cookie cutters on. I have no picture, but just like dried prune and raisin cake- it's something I bake quite often and an overload off pictures isn't what we wish for when it comes to this. 

My cookies got appreciated at de Boed. Baking sand cookies is my go to thing I want to do most often when I don't know what to do during a day in the weekend. Or it feels like I want to do that most when I feel bored. 'What to do next? Hmm, let's bake sand cookies.' or 'I feel like making sand cookies today.' And then I skip it to a day when I have time and opportunity to bake them. I have a few adjustments I make to my receipe to make them 'my.' version off sand cookies. It's something for someone who often suffers from lack off taking initiative that sand cookies are one off these things I still do. Lack off initiative is part off mental disease sometimes. Another thing I take initiative in every often is painting my nails a dark, stormy grey. This weekend it's -24. We go togheter - by Essence on my nails. I got the luck my dark taste is in fashion somehow. I don't follow trends, I barely follow news on that, but what I wear is somewhat cool. Dark colours are in fashion these days. (Allright, I wear happy socks which are in fashion. But it's merely to be funny sometimes to wear loud socks.)  

The rest off my day after lunch was spend with a headache. I had to take rest and order my groceries instead off going to the supermarket. Luckily the headache faded and I could attempt to afternoon coffee to see people's reaction to my cookies. (That is often a high point to my day. People loving my home made treats) Yesterday I had a bad headache too. It started a bit before dinnertime. I had done little that day but making cookie dough and spend my day at de Boed having coffee and just- sitting at one point and doing not much.- (I have that issue again, sometimes I feel somewhat blocked and do nothing with my day but sitting in one place and drinking coffee. Staff at de Boed asking if I want to do something, a game, a walk around the block, often don't get me at that point. I have that again these weeks.) And headache hitted me hard. I had to spend some time in bed after lunch. Maybe I drink too little aside from coffee, and a little too much coffee. It's Anthedonia I got issued with when I have that. That's what it's called when you miss initiative to do things. I nevertless still feel exhausted when spending my day like that. You'd suspect I would not be tired when doing nothing all day, but I sleep at night and I sleep well most off the time. Compared to a few years ago, my sleeping pattern is improved and I'm thankfull for that. Sleep is an important thing when you are a mental patient. It's a luck to still be noticeable about myself, but I can do little to nothing about it when I have these issues. It's feeling stuck inside myself and it's hard. 

Maybe a low vitamin D level hits in again aside from regulair winter gloom. I don't know. I should do something with the text: SAND COOKIES are a LUCK to bake. For some it might not make sense, but for me, they are. (And de Boed likes to provide them with their coffee every often.) I could dip them in melted white chocolate next time and serve them in that variety. I have the idea it would be a perfect match with my regulair receipe. But that's for next time when I feel like giving myself a little challenge. The text noticed above should somehow get a sign. If only for myself. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.     

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