Good evening at the 17th off February, 2022.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today has been stormy and very windy. There are a lot off storms this week over the Netherlands. They´re so intense they even got names. There´s one on the way and one predicted after that while we already had one heavy storm. If you have the chance and don´t need to do something outside, I´d reccomend you all to stay in and keep yourselves safe this weekend. Don´t make more trouble than required. 

Corona restrictions are enlowered and the country is almost free again. We´re off the worst lockdown for now. I hope it will all work out and we don´t have to get back on it after a few months. We´ll see. 

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Today they arrested a violent man who made trouble at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk. In our flat at my gallery, there lives a violent man who's on alcohol a lot and who is not permitted to get at de Boed anymore for causing commotion there quite often. Today he was arrested by the police for even getting in and he made everyone very uncomfortable. They had to move the clients to the hall to stay safe. Luckily nobody got hurt and the arrest went quite easy. 

This week was for Paprika soup. My pet peeve. This week I made it with adjusted meatballs instead off chickenbreast. Most ingredients for it's concistency stayed the same. I practice a lot with paprika soup to find out it's best way off being cooked. I'm almost at the final stage off all these trials (I never had any complaint, I even got compared to restaurants a lot) and I believe I found out my best version, almost. It's truly a basic in my arsenal off soups. I believe I will share the best version with my readers once it's perfect. 

There are a few soups that are basic in my soup arsenal, Paprika soup, Brocoli Courgette, classic Vegetable soup, Old fashioned chicken soup according to the soup bible and my own version off Mustard soup. (And some others I make every often) It's something to be proud off. I haven't achieved much in life, but once a week I'm a good volunteer soup chef at a community centre. Usually it's enough soup for two days. People are gratefull for my soup and that gives me a good feeling.  

I'm about to change medication for the 6th time or so in my life. A medicine that isn't fattening this time and that can replace the fattening one I have been on for so many years. I think it will be a relief once my system got freed from that. I hope it also helps me sleep. I have such trouble sleeping and incredible trouble with my motivation. The psychiatrist said they couldn't do much for me about that and that one had to come out off myself, though medication plays a small role in it. I think the role to medication is a bit bigger than what they claim, but it's hard to discuss it. I just hope changing medication will help and won't be hard for me to stay at an acceptable level with my sanity. I'm still delusional every often, but I can handle it and I'm not a danger for my surrounding with what I have now. By changing it, I might get a bit too itchy about things. And that can be a danger. I'm the kind off psychiatric patient who gets idiotic delusions about historical events that never took place. And her own role in it. It's hard to be in it when I'm severe delusional. When I'm not, I try to be a good person in life though recently I have my bad parts like it seeming to be such an endless road, and I lost my good spirits about it so I got a bit cranky and lazy about life. Winter was also such a draining factor. I do bad in winter and get depressed a lot. I locked myself in a lot and didn't go out more than necessairy.

I'm glad the Covid-restrictions are softened. I lost my good spirits a bit near the end off the lockdown and got mentally downward with my health. As much as it goes by now, it's a bit better these days and I don't know why. Sleep is important, especially for mental patients. I still have bad nights every often where I do hard with my health. I got a bit down in my good spirits from at the beginning where I said 'we can do this, just put your shoulders under it.' I was right, but it became hard at the end and I had to watch my mental capacity for it. I hope we'll stay out off lockdown for now. 

I decided to put a charity in my legacy for when I die. I have no heirlooms and I don't want it to go to waste as that would be a pity. I'm glad nobody heired my disease, and I have no man. But maybe some people who deserve it can do well with it as I think it's not begrudged by others for them. (Maybe it is, but I don't want to leave it to the state or people I barely know. My fortune hopefully will do well for the world.) I haven't made anything official yet. I came to that idea by a TV-show. Sometimes even TV is good for inspiration. My mom and my brothers are still alive, I'll let them have it if something happens with me by now, but if I have to die in the future without any family left, I hope I did well by it.     

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.