Good evening everyone,
Today was grey, cloudy and cold.
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Today was for making mustard soup, my famous mustard soup, which is always perfectly received by the audience. They enjoyed my soup. And it always fullfills me with joy and pride when they do so. It really gives meaning to my -still continueing- weekly volunteer job off soup cheff at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk. Even people who normally don't like soup, say they love my soup. I got compared to hotels and restaurants by people and it's thát good.
While making soup I was overthinking something, and probably I had a delusion and in the worst case a foresight. I was thinking about being poor and what that ment to me in my life, and I was thinking off third wold countries and about this country getting poorer and poorer, and then something got in me: This country will feel as poor as Africa if things continue this way. It's going to get even more sober, people will have less acces to basic needs and healthcare, it's all going to be worse and worse and then damn, we're on a level where this country is not rich anymore. But at the level off Africa. Well, it won't really be at the level off Africa, but it will feel like that for a lot off people, just like I somehow felt and foresaw we will be at war some time. My mental health nurse said these where allright thoughts, they where perfectly normal and she didn't see the delusion in it, since it is going downward in the world and with this country. Worrysome, isn't it? That my fears are not seen as delusional nowadays. I didn't tell her I felt it was foresight, I told her I have been worrying and overthinking about this. And she saw it as perfectly normal since that's what a lot off people do. We are at a crisis situation, after all.
Really, they did one hell off a job de-stabilizing the world with just three years off crisises. I was thinking off my role in that future and what I could do to help, but something told me what I did was just giving people presents, and it didn't solve actuall problems. I can't stabily solve issues like no money for health care, food or energy. Or no acces to clean water. I'm not doing well enough for that myself. I can prepare soup and cakes and I can solve my own problems with what I've got and what's gifted to me. Other than that, I'm one hell off dependant myself on the system. I think especially long hot summers with lots off drought will make it feel like Africa in Europe, though our winters aren't good either if it (Gas and food prices) continues like this. And the economy is shrinking due to war. I have been seeing this two times now: A country that has befallen victim to poverty with spare services provided to the people. We already are, let's face that, but it will be all even worse in the future. Pluto in Aquarius won't be on the foreign level off outer space and modern development, but rather make us feel like third world countries in this part off the world. I don't like people who stick their heads in the sand, since someone should tell this, someone should make this clear somewhere and warn the world.
I have been told in my visions I should be prepared for that, and I shouldn't be ungratefull or expect more from most people than what they can give. I'm so worried about the children. I will get by, but there are still hungry children due to this crisis and parents being poor, in homes with shabby, outworn furniture where there is no money for the holidays. People at de Boed struggle to get by, de Boed serves us only one plate off food instead off having something extra if you finished and it's usually hoping they have enough bread for everyone during lunchtime. Tonights dinner was perfect, but often it's cheap and barely enough for everyone. People have a fear off heathing their homes nowadays in this block, and I can only hope the increase off wages helps them, just like the ceiling for gas prices. Sinterklaas will be cold this year. I break my heart if I think off all those poor and cold children without presents that night.
And this is only the beginning off that shabby country I saw in my vision. The economy shrinks, people can barely eat. There's a cold and expensive winter ahead off us. I hope we will make it through, but thinking about how people make it through worries me. I worry about the world, despite some healthcare says I can't change it and should worry about myself instead, but I can't help it but thinking off others. And feel with them. I can't change the worst things for them. I just can't. All I can do is hope, and bake for them. That is something I can do as long as I can afford that. I wish the Dutch government would tell it's citizens they never walk alone. But only the German did. This government is just buisy with themselves and squeezing us out so it seems. I also foresaw a famine in Europe, but that's in 2040, or within 40 years if they ban farmers from the land and droughts continue like this. Food will be spare some day in the future and our problems won't be solved. In the U.S, it seemed fine. The future doesn't look bright and sparkly if it continues like this. I don't like people who can also see the future but who prefer to try to soften it. Sometimes it is what it is, and I have learned I should stick to it instead off holding back because others don't like it. It's not promising. Let's keep it at that.
Allright, that's about it-
Thank you for reading.
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