Good evening at the 20th off October, 2021.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was cold, gloomy and cloudy and it's a thing to notice that it's still officially Autumn in the Netherlands. The only diffrence with summer is the temperatures. Aside from rainy it happens to be cold. 

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I have to take half a Lorazepame extra each evening to keep myself from getting out off my mind. I felt too unstable to continue medication enlowering. My face and body look somewhat blown up because it's fattening and makes you look like you have no emotions at all, but everything is better than to continue the way it was previous time. With a little luck and green tea I try to re-liven my face. Sometimes it's all liquid that piles up in your body thanks to anti-psychoticums. I bet I won't get rid off my troubles, though. It's a good idea to stay hydrated and keep body fluids flowing, however. But this may sound a bit gross to some. 

I think somewhere I stopped to care- about my face, my skincare, my hair, I don't do much anymore to keep myself looking - acceptable.-  except from basic hygiene and the most necessairy. I'm lucky we have a volunteer beauty expert at de Boed who cuts my hair, but the way I take care off it - doesn't help making me pretty on a daily base. I only wash and brush. It's a bit shamefull to rant about this. The good news I can share with you all out there, is that I've taken interest in bold coloured, nice looking socks. Happy Socks from the nation's cheapest provider in all kinds off textiles but I. Love. Them. 

If a forum requests 'what kind off socks do you wear?' I won't answer with the standard cliché off 'plain black socks.' No Mister. I wear my socks pretty and loud. It was one off the standard cliché questions on plenty off Fantasy Internet Fora back in the day. 'What colour are your socks?' Maybe I'm this fanatic about it because off that. The bolder and the prettier printed the better. Today is for blue socks with festive dots in diffrent colours, and lighter blue coloured toes and heels. Oh woe the witch that dares to destruct my Happy Socks. Happy Socks, Happy Feet- Socks are a relief to cold feet in autumn and winter. (Available at Zeeman.) 

So, I look a bit ungroomed, except for my nice socks. I'm comming to think off the song 'Don't step on my Blue Suede Shoes.' By Elvis because off them. I wear my socks in basic black walking shoes, suitable for any occasion and long walks. 

So, I wear fancy socks and I drink pretty expensive green tea a lot. I'm also still a soup chef every week. Today's Wednesday Soup was for Tomato Soup with meatballs from cookbook 'de Soepbijbel' (The Soup Bible) which turned out looking more orange than a nice tomato shade off red. But nevertless got appreciated by my audience. I roasted my tomatoes before adjusting them. That's the big high point off today. Preparing soup took a lot off energy so I took my rest for the rest off the day. I changed my shirt after soup making and then laid on my bed the rest off the day untill dinner. I have little energy due to medication.   

Life is hard. It gets by a bit boring but to keep on track without falling is a challenge on it's own. 

I lack inspiration for more news on this weblog, so that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.