Good evening at the 19th off September, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today there is a mild storm in the Netherlands. It's been windy and raining cats and dogs today. 

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This evening my mom gave me the best reason to be anti-social: Period hormones which make me get annoyed by fellow clients and staff all the time. Especially the extreme unhygienic and mental types work on my nerves these days. So to stay in was her advice. It's to my personal liking, so I think I'm going to follow that advice. Stay inside and stay away from them, sounds great being comfortably in my own home with tea and chocolate on hand. If it sounds like that. I think my period hormones do get the best off me and it may be a good idea to stay in, instead off calling out someone and start a fight. 

This week I had no money to bake, simply because I hoarded chocolate for this matter. I barely have money to bake anyway, but this week not even something simple for my fellow clients, simply because off hormones. 

Sometimes Facebook annoys me a bit. There was a time where I could afford a luxurious baking for fellow clients almost every week, and I didn't have to save out on it. I was quite good at it and it was very much appreciated in this boring and far off place with nothing else to do on Sunday. During weekdays I could even make them happy with it. Nowadays? It's all too much and I bail because off that. My famous banana cake doesn't show up to them anymore as much as I would like to. So to bake to make them forget the crisis? Not so much for me anymore. 

Makes me have to mention they are gratefull for less than what it's used to be. Plain raisin cake instead off cake with golden raisins and dried prunes for example, and that not even once a month. 

The only time when I could really make something out off a baking, was when someone ordered a birthday treat at me and I made banana-bitterkoekjes quark tart with a chocolate crust for them. I made enough for the whole Boed, and it sure was the best I could do. But that's simply because they paid along for me. But the luxurious quark tart season is probably over for now. I fixed three birthdays with them. I made people really glad with it. But this stupid crisis makes baking 'just because' almost impossible. 

You can guess I'm kinda lethal on menstrual hormones and without a baking to set off my mind to. Annoyed by the side effects to this crisis, and fellow clients and de Boed's current strict policy. 

My mind is kinda tangled this evening. All I can hope for, is the bleeding to start soon and relief me from this terror, which I'm not used to. I usually don't menstruate, so I don't know what it's like to have these hormones all the goddamn time. Maybe that makes me so diffrent from most women. diffrent, and annoying. Them usually being all bitchy while I still believe in peace on earth. Maybe I should not generalize them this way, but maybe not to be fertile makes me slightly diffrent from an average person when it comes to morals and beliefs. Or maybe I'm just strange. A weirdo who doesn't work well. (On top off mental issues.) But it could very well be. I'm not a peace seeker, but usually I take on things more manly than most women in my point off vieuw. 

Somehow I wish there was a solution for all off this, but being born and raised up to this era makes me have to cope with a lot off trouble. Not just with myself, also with the world. Somehow I feel I fit in the modern world perfectly with all off my trouble. Who would have ever thought off that. Just most people annoy me this evening. I'm one old crank this week. I just hope the world has compassion and understanding with me during the week, or maybe I should not seek out on problems and stay in. Otherwise, we'll see how to clean out the mess later on. But for now: Let's hope to survive. Even if it has to be to stay in for a week. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.