Good afternoon at the 31st off January, 2021.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

Tonight there will be a tv show on about baking. I saw a spin off about it this week and I wondered how one off the judges (André van Duin, a famous Dutch comedian) to all the bakings can keep himself from gaining weight while tasting all those baking products each week, twice a week. How can the entire judges keep themselve from gaining weight in that program? I love buying receipe books and follow receipes to winners from that program, (I love inspiration, wherever it may come from.) while actually tonight is the first time I'm about to watch it. While actually I gain weight from just looking at cakes and cookies. It's not fair somehow. (I could fill an entire weblog opinionated on TV shows while I'm actually watching them these days. Before I didn't care much about  TV, but I have to keep myself occupied while being in quarantine for the fourth time this year.) 

I love baking myself too, I have a few cakes I make each time and they are a succes when I serve them to people. They are always highly appreciated. Banana cake and fruit cake on a quark basis are my best cakes. 

*

I foresee 

Something that is near 

I foresee 

Something you don't want to hear 

I know 

It's something you might fear 

Should I tell? 

It's not gone by some promising spell 

The times won't go very well 

years and years about hundred or more 

Will make good fortune for all 

Some sentimental lore 

I've never seen a forecast like this 

on a site before 

I should tell you in honesty today 

But who tells me- My head you won't slay? 

I will still be alive to say 

Times are getting troubled- 

Without you getting mad at me. 

It's all, it's something 

I foresee 

Poverty. 

Bad health. 

Crime. 

Bad times. 

Hunger. 

No jobs. 

People being on their guard 

So somber 

So needy 

Bad economics. 

Poor being poor 

Good fortune to a crash

I'm not a prophet 

licking people's ass 

'T will be long 

untill it's like it was 

About hundred years or more 

Good times will be off lore. 

*

One way or another, I believe the times will be sober, poor, people having bad health and there will be nothing done about it since they are kept stupid by politics. They won't have a spark off hope for the future and are downright suspicious and off bad spirit about most things in life. What was build up in the 20th century will come to a downfall and people have to live their entire life careful with themselves and with money. I foresaw that somehow and I prefer to make you aware instead off telling you something more cheerful. Because we didn't know, because we where kept low into not caring folks. That's how the upperclass probably works. Something is wrong with people who have might nowadays, as they only care for themselves and common people are seen as perfect prey to suck out money from. And nobody actually did something about or against it. It's everybody's fault as far as I see it. Nobody felt like taking actual action. They didn't care enough. How stupid I hope they'll feel in the end. 

 

The good effects off a potential medicine against Corona

 Good afternoon everyone, 

It's a bright but almost frozen day in the Netherlands. Streets and old bridges are covered here and there with a thin layer off frost. Ponds are frozen. It's a day for warm tea and short walks through the neighbourhood to enjoy frozen sights. Old green houses in the village (What Zaanstad is known for) look almost romantic with their coats off frost. Unfortunately, this country is not open for tourists this period off time. But who know you might be capable to visit Zaandijk a next time (Among about 6 million other tourists each year.) 

I can recommend the chocolate milk they sell at Zaandijk Zaanse Schans station where a lot off tourists enter our small village during normal times. It's the best chocolate milk I have ever tasted so far, and it's made bij reintegrating prisoners who wish to do well after getting out off prison. They are polite and costumer-friendly. 

*

There are people vaccinated and getting a vaccination, it's just that people who are already sick or who are still suffering from the effects off Corona could do better with an actual medicine against the outcome to Corona. 

What good could be if people discovered a cure that fixes damaged lungs, brains, hearts and other vital organs? Imagine the benefits from that for science. It's known that Covid-19 digests brains and lungs and reduces them to something unrecognicable from what it was before. If science would invent medications that can grow back damaged hearts and lungs, who knows how much other people with other diseases could benefit from that. It's something good to vaccinate, it's probably even better to cure actual damage. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

  

May she rest in peace

 Good afternoon everyone, 

I told you about a friend off mine some time ago. A proud and strong woman in a wheelchair with spinidus bifida and two sons. She caught cancer about one year ago and she passed away a few months ago. She was a good friend off our family and she was one off the very few people in Castricum actually to take note off people who did bad in life. It's not a common thing for people from my old village Castricum to care about others when they are doing less than they do. It's what I mentioned my entire time while living there. It's almost as if it's a shame to do less, or to be left winged in politics in general up to a serious point. I'm glad I left there and that people in Zaanstad took so well care off me and my mental hiccups. Miss L was diffrent. 

L. got over to my parental home each saturday to watch a tv-show with my mom a lot, and she got over to me to have dinner with me so I could live it up in my kitchen every once in a while and make scrumptious desserts she loved. Her being diagnosed after a life like hers was so unfair. She got troubled being handicaped, and being divorced to the father off her two teenage boys and she fought a lot off battles over her children. Life can be so mean sometimes. I don't like the word 'unfair.' I rather say: 

Life is tough, my darling. 

- But so are you. 

Due to Corona-rules I couldn't attempt at her funeral, but my mom and her husband did. Sometimes I feel she (her spirit) is near me and gives me advice and laughs with me at my jokes and mental issues I have at times. She was a good friend. 

I hope she will find her peace in the world after this one. 

Allright, that's about it. 

Thank you for reading.  

Good afternoon at the 30th off January, 2021.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

*

I had my fourth Corona-test in the entire Corona period (ever since last year) this week, and it got tested negative. I don't have Corona anymore, I survived it last year in November, and appearantly it doesn't get stuck on me anymore ever since. I believe it's a pro. I have been tested about four times off which one was positive. I'm lucky to be physically in a relatively good condition for someone my weight. 

This week is for watching Nickelodeon a lot. I'm having trouble keeping up with the news as it's not good for my mental health. Children's TV works a bit better to keep me distracted from a lot off things. I keep on watching coffee time every morning (With a mug off fresh coffee and sometimes with a pastry) and the news only once a day. It just repeats itself all day at channel 1, often followed by TV shows filled with opinions about what's going on. Most off the time I can perfectly keep up without it getting frightfull. I'm interested in politics and actualities, but riots all the time outside got me mentally troubled. I perfectly understand what Dutch politics and news is all about since I got very lightly educated in that field. It's been a while since I got my diploma, but I got the basics. I somehow wish I could be up for a bachelor in the field off law and politics, but it's probably not ment for me. As you might know, I'm intersted in the field off foreign affairs. But I'm a bit old for a student and mentally handicaped. So probably I'd never get there. 

Sometimes I dream off becoming a tutor in a museum (The Dutch national museum in Amsterdam) ever since a few years ago. And pick their changing exposition. As far as I know, their storage is filled with all kinds off artefacts. Being surounded by old artefacts and art is a dream job for me. As far as that goes, I'm employed in a second hand shop as an Upcycling worker, I make jewelry for them to sell. I only got that job since Leviaan has made a deal with them to get people with a mental handicap to work. I have been making jewelry ever since 2010, since I was about 17 and I'm good at it. Being surrounded by old stuff (It's probably not the same as a museum, but I love it) and bringing it to new or update the lot is fun to have as a job. Becoming a tutor in a serious museum is not ment for me in this life, unfortunately. But I can keep on improving my jewelry every time I set myself to it and improve my methods each time. Last week I finished a necklace and made a bracelet, and previous week I made three bracelets and the start off that necklace. I believe I should picture them and place them online. 

No matter what, I'm content most off the time with my current job at the Upcycling shop. It makes me happy to sell my creations. I'm probably one off the few people who can say they like their job and like their colleagues. And Upcycling stuff is on trend in a lot off places. So what we do is hip and happening- As good as it gets for our spot. I'm proud. I also like the idea I can continue quite a while with the materials we have at the moment. Love what you do, and that's what it's about. 

You heard me saying I'm doing hard getting there and actually withstanding being there without getting low on energy and tired all the time, strange enough, I feel good at energy these weeks and feel like I can continue with what I'm up to. Sometimes I felt like only hanging around there and just have coffee all afternoon with colleagues and just chit-chat. But I feel like having inspiration again and the urge to get out off the house every often. Workshifts are a perfect reason to get out. I hope I can keep it up when the Upcycling gets crowded with costumers again. It's hard to deal with crowdedness for me at times and it can suck me out when that happens, I don't have a good way to block that feeling somehow. 

My jewelry is wanted in my own social circles. I take part in 'Jewelry Making.' at de Boed each monday, and I donate what I make out off charity to de Boed's small outlet. It got sold pretty fast and I saw a lady wearing what I made two weeks ago. I made name in my own circles. I hope real life audience also likes what I try to sell them. I keep on improving myself each time and create more solid creations each time. It improves over time. 

Allright, that's about it for now. 

Thank you for reading.     

'Splash.' - A mandala coloured some weeks ago.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

It's cold and gloomy in the Netherlands. There is not much to do but to get over with being in quarantine for the entire nation today. It's saturday and there is not much to do. A company named AstraZenica is in a fight with the European Union over delivering vaccinations. It's not a bright sight at the horizon so far. 

*

Meanwhile, I dug up a mandala I decided on to call 'Splash.' since it resembles a watersplash in my opinion. 

It has several green, yellow and blue shades and a black star in the centre. I made this during my bad episode around new year's eve. It's in my current portfolio. A cute male care-taker advised me to safe my colourings in an ordner and keep it all togheter safely. Whenever I get a mental break out, it gets more filled. And that's not a problem, I have a few neatly coloured images so far. But it reminds me off a bad episode when I see it alltogheter. I should get over with that, or I should only make things like this when I feel well. I took an attemps in cleaning my camera's lens with a cotton stick so it's blurry spot would be gone. ATM I'm dealing with bad looking glasses so my personal sight can't actually see if that has worked. The good news is that I'll have new glasses soon, and that my bad sight will be solved next month. (I'm up for new glasses. All I have to do is take an eye test at the opticien the upcomming week.) My sight is a bit blurry. I barely see texts at platforms and on tv. How am I up to colouring well you might ask. I personally have no clue either, but I can see lines and colours. I can defy where to colour. So that keeps me going. 

I'm out off all mental pressure from around new year's eve. I believe by displaying all coloured works online, the most work is done so far. I got out off my mind with laughing when getting to think this should get a serious spot in Musee du Louvre in France among all other masterpieces and archeologic artefacts, but the joke got old and I can tell you this without laughing about my own joke. 

 Allright, that's about it for now. 

I hope you enjoyed reading.   

Violent riots are not what protest marches are supposed to be about

 Good evening everyone, 

A storm off violent outbreaks and riots off destruction has come over the Netherlands. It's been all over the news every day. Groups off young hooligans destroy city centres and cause fires and plunder innocent shops. 

This has been real. It's not some story I hang up to you. 

*

A vew years ago, I took part with my mom in good protest marches for better health care and a better salary for those who work in health care. That has nothing to do with what has been on TV nowadays. The right to demonstrate in peace shouldn't be destructed with such violence. I feel uneasy when I see people hanging this up under the name off protest marches. It got me upset and I'm not in the power to do something about it that can stop it. All I can do is blog about it to you, as I think it's important. 

If this ever got to a civil war, I'm afraid we (The sane people) can't win, because those hooligans are more aressively violent and insane than most people suppose they are. They are capable to murder in violence and laugh about it. As how I personally have experienced the very few times I had to do with that breed off people. I rather don't like to be around such scum. They are insanely violent and up to what we think to this day as inhumane. I like to warn people against real civil war, as such twists and turns in history can lead to insane leaders to a country and even more violence and war if we don't watch out well. I might overthink too much, but I rather foresee the worst outcome and be ahead off it instead off being suprised by what might be. 

What if the government could get a hold on the app 'Telegram.' and hack it for this purpose and lay down the entire network as far as step one goes? Then lay down their facebook profiles and other social media platforms as much as possible. I've heard 'Telegram' is in the hand off Russians. I'm weary off Russia when it comes to overthinking war. If Russia wants to get their enemy down on their knees, they will and they'll use whatever they can get their hands upon for that purpose. They are far more sneaky than what straight forward thinking westerners suspect most off the time, but what they do and what they might do is the way to win modern war.  

A large number off people in this country being frustrated about the way things go nowadays could have came in handy for them if they wish to get a hold on the Netherlands for something. Swipe them up and cause trouble for the normal citizen. but I wouldn't like to go that far when overthinking the incidents that are going on these days. I don't know why, but this came to my mind. 

All off this might be a bit too much for my troubled mind, but I decided not to watch the news today to keep myself at peace. I would be on and on about conspiracy theories all day (and probably all night, and a lot off time after that) if I wouldn't have done that. Instead I have watched a Nickelodeon TV show called 44 cats and made myself banana pancakes today. It kept me occupied some time and my mind has come a bit to peace. But still I'm weary. 

What if it's forbidden to have an opinion about anything after this violence and most ways to state an opinion will be rigidly forbidden in the future in the west? That would be terrible as I think we (the people) can't get a hold on governments if we can't state opinions to begin with. It's a scenario I have also foreseen a few times. It's human nature to have an opinion. I would feel terrible if I couldn't state mine somewhere anymore. I don't know what I'm about to vote this year for Dutch elections. 

I think the left wing should have and get themselves an immense block in seats in our parliament to behold power against the sneaky right wing, but it's splintered and it can't really make a fist as far as I see it these days. It's not been healthy for our country to have been in the hands off Rutte and his right winged party as poverty has increased and social unequalness has grown the past ten years. It's what the frustration off the mass outside comes from. It's just that a lot off people seem to have grown a bit more unknowing about their facts when it comes to politics, or that they have become status seekers and a bit too ignorant for what's going on. It's not healthy for this nation to keep it going like that. 

Allright, that's about it for now. 

Thank you for reading.     

   

The entire Boed is in lockdown

 Good evening everyone, 

There's a (part) pink sky with purple clouds over Zaandijk this evening. The air is defenetely stunning to look at. It's cold but the air has been clear all day. 

*

One off our care- takers has been tested positive, and now the entire community centre around my corner is closed for about 20 days. Up until February and I don't like it. 

I came to de Boed this morning like every day and I got my medicine, took an attemps in baking them cookies to go with coffee moments, but while I was up to sticking them out with cookiecutters, we got the news one off the staff members was tested positive. Everyone who has been around her these days has to be tested, including me. I shouldn't let it get the best off me. I have been taking this entire crisis without losing myself to it, I should keep my calmth in this case. But it's something that makes me feel worried about the well-being of the entire Boed. This kind off things never come in positive. Mentally sick people can't take such things well and it's a burden for them to turn around their entire day at once this week. But it's what everyone else has been doing the entire time. I shouldn't complain. 

I had to inform my mom and make her worried again. I feel bad about my ratio in which I got her on her nerves over me a lot. I have been tested about three times this year already and this is going to be the fourth. 

I had to finish my cookies at home this afternoon and it kept me buisy all day after we got in lockdown. I'm a bit stuck with an entire box off self made sand cookies with cinnamon. I got sugar and cinnamon in the egg-wash to give it an extra taste, but I feel I made an entire lot just for myself and I hope I'll be tested negative so I can hand out some to other people during this lockdown. (There is a give away closet down the hall off the first floor, I could place some off them packed in smaller portions in there. I just think I won't be tested either positive or negative any time soon. Sometimes I wish I had a family and a husband in my life to share all good foods I make with. I mainly share what I make at de Boed for a small public. But I have to keep everything myself now.) 😔😩  

I worked with cookie cutters the shape off letters and numbers. It even had hashtags and thumb up cutters, and a few heart shaped cutters. I think it tastes perfect and it's almost a waste I have so many. It's the only issue I have I feel like complaining about. First world problems I suppose. I could also give myself a good evening and have some aside some chocolate milk. Problem solved. 

Allright, that's about it for now, 

Thank you for reading.