Good evening at the 20th off March, 2022.

 Good evening everyone, 

Spring has started officially today. 

Today was cloudy and the day ended with a wash off rain. It has been sunny yesterday and I have been sunbathing a bit. I love how I have been tanning a bit without burning. I'm sometimes so glad for lengthened daylight and sun comming through during these days. It makes my day when I can sunbathe. (With my coat on, just a little. But the feeling is nevertless great) 

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It's been a hard day. I have been painting my toenails and drinking coffee in the morning, then I went to de Boed for some company but near the end off afternoon, my mind couldn't take it anymore and I had to take a break from being there. After that I had dinner at de Boed and that's been my day. It's not been incredibly hard, but that itch near the end made it somewhat hard. Medication switching is hard. I'm glad I'm still alive these days. It's been a day like most. I have the sense I live from weekend to weekend sometimes without life being very fullfilling, but I have to take it. I mentioned my writing and this weblog getting a bit blurry previous time. Not written as neat as I wanted it to. I believe when I do hard, my writing shows it through and my blog gets blabby. (I don't know if that's a word, but I mean a bit messy with it) 

I got a bit disappointed the dessert bible isn't out yet, while the publisher promised me it would be previous year in November or December. It's something to look forward to as dessert making is one off the best things in my life. (I'm not over-acting it, it's a big hobby off mine) I'd love the dessert bible being published one off these days. 

My cold has faded within a night. I kid you not. I must have a guardian angel on my shoulder when it comes to such issues. It's good to have one. I appreciate mine deeply. 

I have had a cold and medication switching is not going easy, but so far I can say I survived this week but don't ask me how. It's been incredibly hard and I'm not as content with life as I was a few years ago. I live the life off a mentally sick woman. Haha. (I actually am one, but now it gets more and more serious and wrecking) I wish I had a more fullfilling life where I would care more for my hobbies, but to be honest, I do hard setting myself to a lot off things. Sometimes I'm so glad my small home is so nicely put togheter and decorated and just sitting here is nice. Just to sit somewhere and have coffee and small talk makes me glad a lot off time. My mind is so tired most off the time and over-prickling it is never a good idea. I mentioned my brain and I are emotionally tired a lot since I learned from Psych2go on Youtube what that contains. Aside from schizophrenia, I'm tired due to it a lot. Medication also makes people incredibly tired most off the time. drained from energy and it's probably a bit too much to truly cure that for a guardian angel since it's almost chronically. Nothing is sacred, except sleep. I bale a bit that I have to get up early again for medication each morning. 

I hope this new medication works out like it's supposed to. That saves me from more trauma when it comes to medication and even more nasty switches as they're hell. I believe I can speak off trauma because off it since it hurts so much physically. It's cruel. I hope they will invent something that works in easier and less painfull, that doesn't fatten and which works against psychosis. I don't know why mental health care has to be so cruel sometimes. It's always been a drama historically seen, but they could make those pills easy to take. I suppose I should be glad I live in this time since it could have been terrific if I lived about 60 years ago with this issue. It's still something terrible. But at least I'm capable to do my best in life when I'm at my best and do good for my surrounding. It still sucks. 

At least there is sunshine these weeks. At least I can live, despite it being hard. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.