Good evening at the 14th off December, 2022.

 Good evening everyone,  

It's freezing and ice cold outside. It's no weather for wimps. 

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About Vana Events, 

How does an organisation that calls itself emancipated have such unemancipated, unwritten rules, and how come idiots with unemancipated vieuws have made themselves so dominant among them? How come people look away when it comes to that, and why do they slut shame and body shame as much as they do? 

They have one unemancipated tut called Natasha and she is NOT cool when she shows us another picture on the internet about how pretty she is. Covered in expensive gowns and make-up while most people in the fantasy scene can't afford that, and since when are women forced to wear make-up by those unwritten rules? That's not cool. It would be much more off a cool thing for Natasha to show herself without make-up, with wrinkles, glasses and as natural and true as she is. Instead off playing the high madam, she better tones it down this year due to the energy crisis and people not being capable to afford it anymore. She's not cool when she tries to impress people with a low income who can't afford it anymore with expensive make-up, jewels, and clothes. Not to say about her hair. She sucks. She's not emancipated but her drive to look stunning despite the crisis is not the only thing that bothers me. She catcalls people, and she wishes to drag down the self-confidence off young women by saying they have too much guts. Which a woman off that position should NEVER declare to someone a bit minor to that, she only adresses  you that when she has her two ladies in waiting siding her, on a crowded Keltfest. Otherwise I bet she would never have had the nerves for it, and she can't bring up the character to respond to it.  I think she is the shamefull one in this case. 

Am I jealouse off her? If I tell you I'm not you will tell me I am, and that's another thing that bothers me about the Fantasy scene: The whole fixation on jealousy. I hate that. I rather go through life not jealouse and my heart as free as a breeze. I rather want to fight for something someone else has for my own, instead off envying them. I wish never to act out off jealousy. I suppose a lot off men have betrayed their women in those circles for it to have become that low. I would never steal a man, and I don't like it when people declare me that. I guess they have envied me for my youth and my power when I was young. And my beauty. No matter how loud and vulgair they declare nowadays I'm 'Not Pretty.' Hearhearhear. They can't stand me and they play filthy tricks on me, and that is the truth. 

A man was stolen from me, and then they started to declare me ugly. I wish to get more clarity in my own emotions before even giving in to those nasty delusions that came with it. I have been put into a mental hospital because that happened, I wrote letters and postcards to Vana due to it, but they never had the character to respond to it at all. Vana is a bit buisy on the ladder off unemancipatedness and filthy tricks, and that's why I decided to write this blog, and simply because I hate Natasha, who everyone is supposed to like since she never shows being such a BITCH to most people, and you just have to love her for everything she does according to them, but I downright hate her. She doesn't kick ass, she is not cool, she is unemancipated, she tells people to get married and have children or they don't count anymore, She's too made up for a crisis and she doesn't stand her ground. When Vana has to defy colour in a political field, they don't stand their ground and bounce back from it. Which is not a cool thing. 

It's also a thing that you HAVE to find love, and HAVE to be in a relationship and get married and have children as soon as possible. Or you're somewhat off a misfit among them. That's not cool either. People (Like me) might have their sane reasons to be single and never to have been in a relationship in their entire life, and that's not a stage play I put up, or a drama, but simply the way things always have been for me and how my life is designed. Maybe it's just ment for me to devote my life to cooking for others, be a mental patient, be a  fat, ratchet bitch, and do exactly as I please. It has pros when you remain single your entire life and that's MY destiny. I don't want others to judge me so hard on it. But it's a thing that comes from them to get comitted as soon as possible when you're young, or you're a slut and a whore. 

I got declared a whore and a slut a thousand times over. Which is not emancipated either. I don't want to look all made up, but I don't want to look all dolled down either. I don't want to steal men from their women, but still be friends with them and I want to be free in what I do or don't, which gives me the tag off a whore among those people. I didn't want to be with Faust, and have his children. And all my flirting outside those lines where probably seen as whoring, or being an too uplifting spirit online, that could be it, too. I didn't want to bang around with them, I'm still standing above it all now I'm 30 and they have been talking nasty about me behind my back for 12 awfull years. Nothing is true about that. I kept my virginity, and my pride for me personal. No matter what they tell you about that. And that's one reason to keep on blogging: To keep on providing you the truth. Despite not being capable to defend myself when they gossip. I play it as straight and honest as possible when I do this. 

And then those playboy bunnies that where cool right after Faust got off with a younger, more pretty looking girl. As if male fertility was seen as something utmost cool, while I crippled in the insane assylum about it. That's awfull. It's terrible. I never had interest in Faust, Bloodshot always has been more my thing to be honest. But he is taken and I don't steal. But no one ever asked for my true opinion about it and now it's too late. They have always forced me inside a box I never fitted into when it came to men. Vana has been acting like a pig to me. 

I think it would be cool if true feminism woul become a thing again on those events and among pagans. Not the archetype off a mother who cooks behind her stove, but a true, untamed witch. Like me. Something true to believe in as it's bullshit they sell nowadays. What's with those big, violent, pig looking aso's that dominate the events nowadays? Vana has turned to shit and attracts assholes these years, but it's not something new, it's something from the previous years that's been happening. Even more male dominance, and female ignorance about it. I just hate it and it shouldn't be tolerated like that. If Natasha had more guts, she would stand up against such stupidity and finally do something about the polarisation and the people who follow her becoming more stupid by the minute. I think Vana only tolerates that for the money, just like the commercialism off Fantasy and Paganism. It brings up a whole lot off money if you sell it like that. If you tolerate the aso's and the bullying on events they bring with them. 

It's not completely due to Faust I have never came back to events, it's just been a drop in a full bucket I couldn't take anymore. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.     

Good evening at the 13th off December, 2022.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was one hell off a cold. It has been freezing at night, and daytime was ice cold. There was frost all over the streets when I woke up. 

*

Today I have been making an attempt in sicking out a cold. I'm sick and I have been in pyjama's all day, being in bed. It's freezingly cold and I'm sick. I won't be capable to prepare Wednesday soup tomorrow for de Boed, but someone wanted to teach me how to make Chinese tomato soup. She ordered all ingredients for it and wanted to make it togheter with me, but I believe tomorrow it's on her. I'm glad I have a replacement during the cold. 

I have been sick, the living room looks like a pighouse due to all the tissues I have been snouting, it's freezingly cold in the Netherlands (Especially during nights.)  Caretakers decided it was better for me not to cook soup tomorrow, what else is there to say about today? I just hope I will get well soon. 

Sometimes it's best to stand tall, especially during a crisis, during these cold days. I have been thinking to take example off the British during WWII and try not to be stirred by it as good as possible, but I'm afraid I'm only human after all, and I feel with all those poor and cold people who have no money for food or Christmas. Especially when it pops up in my mind, I can feel with them. I personally do as well as I probably can during these days. I can talk easy. I have little to fear or to owe up for these days. I shouldn't speak for the mass who is cold and hungry, and who has enough off it- but a little bravery and standing tall is never a bad idea. In my predictions, we're only at the beginning off this massive crisis. It's not a good idea to lose one's head over it this soon. 

I have been thinking, what if they mobilize europe to fight with the Ukranians? It's not happening, but what if? What if people from here where forced to fight against the Russians because Ukraine can't stand it anymore? Is that a foresight or just a feeling? And how will I personally do within one year? Just sayin'. I do well at the beginning off this idiocy, but as time goes by, it goes on and on, and how will I do if things keep on going this way for at least five years? Will I manage to come round by then? That's the main question, and what kind off country will this become in such a range off time if this continues? I'm so glad I don't have children and hungry mouths to feed this winter. I will get by and I can live for myself with help from de Boed. Since I'm Schizo, I believe I have no threat in being mobilized for a war since they can't use me. As far as I oversee this. My main issue is to survive this period myself. I don't know if people truly will be called upon to fight. I believe by then we're in serious trouble and that's a stage later. First concern is if Russia will turn off the gas to Europe entirely. As I had a foresight that might eventually happen this winter. They don't care we're starving and hungry, it's a war tactic and they're Russians. I bet they laugh about us when it comes to it. They're goddamn morrons with a lack off morals. We shouldn't think too straight when it comes to war when we're fighting them. A little outside the lines and with a blurred sense off justice will get us much further than them. We will eventually enlower ourselves to that level, but we won't survive if we don't. It's idiocy, it's cruel, it's venom and your train off thought will be altered- but this is Russia. 

I think we should think it a bit crooked to win this war. With a strategy instead off straight ahead, in that case I think we should bomb Moscow with a nuclear bomb- that's probably the only way to get them on their knees. Don't think too soft during wartime, that won't help. Otherwise there should be something to ban them from Ukraine at once, and get them on their knees like a dog to show who's the boss. But with this gas tactic, they're teaching us. I don't think soft when it comes to war. As this is what it is. How to teach Russia a lesson? Usually they are masters when it comes to that, filthy tricks. But now we need something to stay ahead to that. They are FAR ahead to us with increasing food prices, gas prices, and monopoly on grain. This is something the Taliban could only dream off. How to win this war without starting something lethal for the entire world? I have no sane clue. Not an insane one either.

I have to get by. I have to be sure my stock is on an acceptable level, and I can make it through. How will everything be in one, or even five years off cruel war? This better doesn't continue for too long. 

I have been thinking about myself, wondering if the 70's would suit me in opinion on politics, but I'm too much off a cowboy to accept the softness off hippiesque bohemian, I'm rough when I need to be and I'm not a pleaser and I follow my own guidance. Even if it's against the opinion off the mass. I follow my own inner guidance when that is needed and feels right. I'm not a person for too soft bullshit. I can be polite, which I mainly am, but I'm not a conformist. People who have no manners stroke me against the manes, but I'm also tough enough to disrespect it when it's too political correct and hypocrit. I don't like that. I'm not overly feminin when it comes to that, women are supposed to please. I simply don't do that. I rather be honest with people most off the time. I have my manners, but I don't like bullshit. 

How to win a war without sucking out Europe entirely? I'm not personally asked to come up with a strategy, No secret services have called me for it so far. I'm just a citizen with an opinion and a mental issue. My concern should be cleaning the kitchen, and getting rid off my flu. Preferably before next week. And staying warm this night. But I can't help thinking off this and thinking out a strategy. 

Allright, that's about it for now- I hope I won't lose my head over it. 

Thank you for reading.  

Good evening at the 10th off December, 2022.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was cold, cloudy, grey and misty. It's been cold and depressing outside and at night it's freezing. 

*

Today was for baking linzertorte. 

I made it with home made red fruit jelly I made yesterday with fruits and sugar I still had 'on the shelves.' I had a left over fruit in my freezer, and some jelly sugar for jam in my cupboard. Then I thought I had a lot off ingredients on stock and looked up the receipe for linzertorte. All I needed was a lemon. I felt it was worthit to face the cold for it, and so this project came to be. 

It's freezingly cold and depressing as a doorknob outside at the moment. I even had the hazelnuts on stock for this receipe and the almond chives. So I think it's not overly expensive with items I had to purchase for it. I could afford despite it all. And my fellow clients and the neighbours will probably love it tomorrow for their afternoon coffee. I have the voice off Dr. Phil in my head, telling me I have a problem with being a hoarder off baking items. That's true but this time it came to good use. It's a cold and boring December day during a massive crisis. And tomorrow will be even more depressing and boring. We can use some off this tomorrow. 

Linzertorte is the oldest known tart in the world. It's receipe dating back to 1650 Linzer, in Austria. I'm pretty sure people used to eat tarts and such before, but that's not registred, so this is officially the oldest. It's a December favourite and it's been on my wishlist for a while to try making it. It makes me dreamy to think off such receipes and trying them. Baking can connect me in my imagination and dreams with times and places beyond borders. International receipes, or classic receipes sure have that power. Which makes baking an even better hobby. That's been my day today, preparing Linzertorte and having lunch in between at de Boed. 

It's ment for de Boed's Sunday afternoon coffee. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.   

Good afternoon at the 8th off December, 2022.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

Today is cold and somewhat gloomy in the Netherlands, all leaves have fallen from the trees and it's somehow a depressing sight.

*

Today was for swimming, provided by a sports program from the government to promote excercise to poor and mental people. I can swim every Thursday, which I usually do. I haven't lost weight so far, but I love swimming and it's fun. 

And it was a day for Paprika soup. My paprika soup is people's favourite. I used to practice with the substance untill it was really good and nothing needed to be done about it anymore. The only thing I vary with, is either chicken meat or meatballs adjusted to it at last. Other than that I have a good and firm idea about how my paprika soup has to be. After a while off practicing, I stopped making it so often but then I got it requested from people who had made it their favourite. Since I kept making it as perfect as possible, it wasn't 'That same old paprika soup.' for them, but their beloved favourite. So this week was for perfect paprika soup, as decadent as can be, with carrots, red paprikas, sweet potatoes, fresh tomatoes, spices (Paprika powder and curry powder), cooking cream, Boursin cuisine, tomato paste, lemon juice, you name it and it was in it- and meatballs. This week my paprika soup had a good amount off meatballs from a larger amount off minced meat than I usually use, since I wanted people to have enough meatballs in their bowls. 

For a crisis like this, that soup says a lot. It makes me proud to serve them a bowl off comfort each week. If this was a serious restaurant, they had to pay quite a price for it. But it's a community centre which provides services to mental health patients and which also functions as a daycare centre, so they just have to pay the price for a regulair lunch and they can have two bowls if they like. de Boed has increased it's prices for lunches to keep up with inflation. But people don't have to pay extra for a bowl off fresh soup. 

I have a few soups I know by heart what goes in it, I have been practicing them quite often, and other soups are from cookbooks. But my version off paprika soup I know by heart. Somehow I think our inflation is adjust for my fresh soups. Then it's legid. But usually I think we just got robbed off even more money for the same lunch, but then provided more expensive. It will be made even more expensive in April. Just like dinner. Some people can't even afford it anymore. They bring their own bread nowadays. de Boed has decided for them, my soup is free so they can still have a bowl. I make large pots off soup each week. So they can have some. It's also provided to our van driver when it's swimming day. He complimented me on the soup today. It's quite a service. And I'm proud off it.     

I'm so glad de Boed provides all off that, I myself could never afford to make such divine soup. I can even make people who usually don't like soup, like my soup. They love them. It's the perfect weather for soups. Gloomy, grey and cold. And I did well to decide it had to have extra meatballs. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 5th off December, 2022.

 Good evening everyone, 

*

Today was for dessert making at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk. I made my fellow clients and myself a Sinterklaas dessert, chocolate milk panna cotta. It's a receipe as easy as pie. I topped it with whipped cream and 'pepernoten.' Small spiced Sinterklaas cookies. Most fellow clients enjoyed it. I had the luck the panna cotta wanted to stiffen this time. The previous time when making it, I had too little gelatin and I failed. The second time we had a delicious panna cotta, however. And they thought it out for this day, for Sinterklaas evening. 

I have no kids, and I don't live with my parents anymore. So I don't celebrate Sinterklaas. It's something for kids, and if you're lucky, adults if they still celebrate, but my mom doesn't want to ever since my dad died. I miss it. I have had some presents from mom when she visited last week, but I sobbed a few tears this period over not being capable to celebrate Sinterklaas with my dad and his family, and over poor children who are not capable to celebrate Sinterklaas. If they come to school they can't say they got a present to their classmates, and the idea off them getting bullied over that made me cry. Poor children sometimes make me cry these days. 

So, I had some presents in Christmas style. Mom does celebrate Christmas since she likes that more. I haven't been completely sad and it cheered me up to have been given presents this period. It feels good to to get presents and be a bit rewarded for all my good work and being a good person this year. I did my utmost best for it. It's important to share and give, but sometimes it feels so good to be given something back for it. 

Especially since grocery shopping felt like being robbed instead off Sinterklaas. I haven't even purchased much, but it was still so expensive and it felt screwed to be forced to pay so much for it. Still I was capable to buy what was needed and I could afford. I'm proud off myself I can withstand the crisis this long with what I've got, despite it's not much. And maybe I should be gratefull for that 10% wage increasement we got these months. And my capable administrator and her office. They deserve praise too for their hard work. I have the feeling I will be capable to withstand the entire crisis. I just hope it doesn't take too long and get too intense. I have the feeling the entire country will be demolished if it takes, say, five years. But then again, I had the feeling off having to live in a Country that will get as poor as Africa. The famous prophet Nostradamus had predicted this crisis. If you know his works, you know he predicted this and all off this will get well one day either. According to the interprentation off his prediction, Latin American countries will help Spain and Portugal to get out off this crisis, and they will help us to get out off it. Learn Spanish, It might not make sense now, but later on it might be important in the future if you want to have anything to do with world business. I remembered this phrase from the predictions I have been reading some time ago. I just can't remember what year we will be saved. Still, it helps me to keep my head held high to know it will end one day. I should re-read it to get a better hang on it. It could be 20 and effin 30 before we got saved, or 2028 if I remember well. Uranus will be out off Taurus in 2026, which also might mark the end off a crisis. But I shouldn't be speculating, I should know an exact year, or it might sound too vague for many a sceptic. 

Still. The country will be screwed over big time if this crisis takes this long. I don't know if most people can withstand, no matter the 10% wage increasement. It teaches many a spoiled brat some lesson in gratefullness, and taking a step back in materialism. I know, but it's not good if it takes too long and too much off us. Still I personally think I can withstand for the time being and that says a lot. 

It's not the end off mankind, and it's not the end off the world. It will still be there and turn afterward, but I should be realistic if I overvieuw the short- term future. I don't make myself ilusions over money or posessions. It will take a lot off hard work and strong willpower to withstand this. Not spending it on luxury, Watch my spendings in the supermarket and for me personal, keep something behind for extra rough times and keep my stock on a good level. Think before you spend. I could afford some Christmas luxury this year, due to gifts from mom and knowing my administrator allows me that. But that's due to not spending crazy amounts off money during the rest off the year. I'm also saved because I eat meals at de Boed every time. They increased the price for their meals, but still it's affordable to eat there alltogheter and let them cook. It's not fancy, it's a lot off boiled potatoes, but it's acceptable most off the time. 

I heard some people don't heath their homes anymore. At all. Not even during cold. I have the luck Leviaan pays for that for me and fellow clients. I don't have anything to do with gas and electricity prices if they keep on doing that. I can moderately heath despite it all. I have a lot off luck with that. I don't know what I would do without this. Sometimes I have the feeling I have been given this luck, that I'm destined to be saved during this crisis by a higher power and that's the reason why I survive. I have no other explaination for it than simple faith, by whatever power that is. For being a good and helpfull person, probably. Or maybe it's plain charity simply because I'm handicapped. Whatever the reason, I'm lucky. I don't live spoiled, it's actually small and basic care. But it's there when it's needed. Also during these dark times. And that's why I know I will survive, despite it all. I can't do much, I have a handicap, I'm on heavy medication and I have a low condition. But this I will survive thanks to where I live. I'm lucky and despite not having a real Sinterklaas, that is my greatest gift. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.         

Good evening at the 30th off November, 2022.

 Good evening everyone,

Today was grey, cloudy and cold. 

*

Today was for making mustard soup, my famous mustard soup, which is always perfectly received by the audience. They enjoyed my soup. And it always fullfills me with joy and pride when they do so. It really gives meaning to my -still continueing- weekly volunteer job off soup cheff at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk. Even people who normally don't like soup, say they love my soup. I got compared to hotels and restaurants by people and it's thát good. 

While making soup I was overthinking something, and probably I had a delusion and in the worst case a foresight. I was thinking about being poor and what that ment to me in my life, and I was thinking off third wold countries and about this country getting poorer and poorer, and then something got in me: This country will feel as poor as Africa if things continue this way. It's going to get even more sober, people will have less acces to basic needs and healthcare, it's all going to be worse and worse and then damn, we're on a level where this country is not rich anymore. But at the level off Africa. Well, it won't really be at the level off Africa, but it will feel like that for a lot off people, just like I somehow felt and foresaw we will be at war some time. My mental health nurse said these where allright thoughts, they where perfectly normal and she didn't see the delusion in it, since it is going downward in the world and with this country. Worrysome, isn't it? That my fears are not seen as delusional nowadays. I didn't tell her I felt it was foresight, I told her I have been worrying and overthinking about this. And she saw it as perfectly normal since that's what a lot off people do. We are at a crisis situation, after all. 

Really, they did one hell off a job de-stabilizing the world with just three years off crisises. I was thinking off my role in that future and what I could do to help, but something told me what I did was just giving people presents, and it didn't solve actuall problems. I can't stabily solve issues like no money for health care, food or energy. Or no acces to clean water. I'm not doing well enough for that myself. I can prepare soup and cakes and I can solve my own problems with what I've got and what's gifted to me. Other than that, I'm one hell off dependant myself on the system. I think especially long hot summers with lots off drought will make it feel like Africa in Europe, though our winters aren't good either if it (Gas and food prices) continues like this. And the economy is shrinking due to war. I have been seeing this two times now: A country that has befallen victim to poverty with spare services provided to the people. We already are, let's face that, but it will be all even worse in the future. Pluto in Aquarius won't be on the foreign level off outer space and modern development, but rather make us feel like third world countries in this part off the world. I don't like people who stick their heads in the sand, since someone should tell this, someone should make this clear somewhere and warn the world. 

I have been told in my visions I should be prepared for that, and I shouldn't be ungratefull or expect more from most people than what they can give. I'm so worried about the children. I will get by, but there are still hungry children due to this crisis and parents being poor, in homes with shabby, outworn furniture where there is no money for the holidays. People at de Boed struggle to get by, de Boed serves us only one plate off food instead off having something extra if you finished and it's usually hoping they have enough bread for everyone during lunchtime. Tonights dinner was perfect, but often it's cheap and barely enough for everyone. People have a fear off heathing their homes nowadays in this block, and I can only hope the increase off wages helps them, just like the ceiling for gas prices. Sinterklaas will be cold this year. I break my heart if I think off all those poor and cold children without presents that night. 

And this is only the beginning off that shabby country I saw in my vision. The economy shrinks, people can barely eat. There's a cold and expensive winter ahead off us. I hope we will make it through, but thinking about how people make it through worries me. I worry about the world, despite some healthcare says I can't change it and should worry about myself instead, but I can't help it but thinking off others. And feel with them. I can't change the worst things for them. I just can't. All I can do is hope, and bake for them. That is something I can do as long as I can afford that. I wish the Dutch government would tell it's citizens they never walk alone. But only the German did. This government is just buisy with themselves and squeezing us out so it seems. I also foresaw a famine in Europe, but that's in 2040, or within 40 years if they ban farmers from the land and droughts continue like this. Food will be spare some day in the future and our problems won't be solved. In the U.S, it seemed fine. The future doesn't look bright and sparkly if it continues like this. I don't like people who can also see the future but who prefer to try to soften it. Sometimes it is what it is, and I have learned I should stick to it instead off holding back because others don't like it. It's not promising. Let's keep it at that. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.         

Good afternoon at the 27th off November, 2022.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

Today it's cold, windy, grey and rainy in Zaandijk, a small town in the Netherlands. 

*

The story off the egg-beggar: 

I've been purchasing a box off eggs, intending to make brownies instead off cookies. Given I would have had all ingredients on stock, including fine quality dark chocolate which my mom gave me 'Ment for baking.' And some walnuts from the market. I looked up 'The domestic godess.' By Nigella Lawson, and I have been chopping chocolate and walnuts already, but last night during dishes they told me today a caretaker would wave their goodbye today and had treats with them already. I was lucky I had in mind to bake the brownies today, so they would have them fresh and warm out off the oven. Unlike cake, which is better the day after, brownies are better served warm. I had the luck I haven't been baking them yesterday, otherwise it would have been a waste. I have been storing my chopped chocolate and walnuts for the upcoming week, and I had some eggs for breakfast. It's a bit off a sad story, but luck isn't with me this week. 

I haven't had much luck with black friday, and a necklace broke yesterday, so I purchased some sterling silver chains to replace it. Now I'm close to broke and December hasn't even started. I have been purchasing a warm large Christmas sweater, and a winter chique duvet cover. Like I wanted to with a small amount off discount. I expect to get money in December from my accountant, but it's not much and I can't shop 'till I drop anymore. It's not the end off the world, and I own Christmas make-up, presents, a duvet cover, pyjamas, decorations, and if my sweater arrives, an outfit and that's the stuff I wanted to have this year. I still have a small amount off money for Christmas, but no opportunities soon to do the last shopping. I have been losing my mind a bit over Christmas this year, and despite not being rich, I have been spending money like an idiot, but in my defence: I barely do that. Usually I wait untill I have a healthy amount off money on my pay account and then see what I can buy with that, but now it's far below healthy and I probably will be sore in January and February. It can't do bad to keep two No-Spend-Months next year. I think I also will be mentally sore in January and February when all the Christmas stuff goes out off shops and daily life has to go on without sparkle. Usually I try to make the best off these months by thinking off fun things to do, like baking with coffee and wearing pinks and other bright colours to keep some joy. And take a bit care off the Lonely Hearts club off de Boed who need a baking after Christmas to help them cope with their loneliness. But this year I'm focused on Christmas cheer and I expect to be a bit sore myself the rest off the winter. 

Yesterday I have been trying out a new look with my Christmas make-up box and it looked good on me. I barely wear make-up. But yesterday I was all pretty and dolled up. I took a walk to Koogerpark with a caretaker, and then went egg-buying. (Aside to other breakfast items.) It wasn't a bad day, untill my necklace broke and I had to buy new chains to replace it and spend some amount off money on it. Was it thát important? Yes, it was. It can't be bad to own a few silver chains for pendants, I have a few loose pendants who still need a chain, but preferably not now, and not this month, but that's exactly what it did: Break yesterday. Maybe it's been good for something, after all. You never know.  

Today is for sleeping in instead off baking brownies, having coffee in the morning and do laundry. When I feel broke and poor, I like to wash my clothes with the chique laundry wash and softner I always have on stock in my storage. And make myself good coffee, and I had a cookie with it this morning so I shouldn't feel poor and nearly broke. I still do well, I have items on stock and I can eat every day with what I still 've got. And I'm washed. Let's not forget about that. It's not limited Christmas edition showergel, but it's good stuff and I smell nice with it and I bodybutter after it. So I'm not doing bad. But look at what we still do have. I agree it's not little. And rain is good for vegetation.

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.