Good evening at the 28th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today it's grey, cloudy and pretty dreary outside. Spring seems to be far away. It's even raining at the moment. 

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Easter, a lot off people dismay it because the war and the crisis this year. I don't say they're not right, I'm just saying I feel in an Easter mood. I have an Easter branch, and I purchased a few cute Easter decorations this year. I don't know if I should feel guilty about it. Today I even went back to the supermarket. To purchase the male Easter rabbit from a couple I purchased the female from yesterday. So today I own a male and female Easter rabbit set, dressed in vintage children's clothing. I fell for them, and they where not expensive. So I thought they where mine.

I bought it and had lunch in the supermarket restaurant, and treated myself to a slice off strawberry bavaroise cake with it. Just too good almost for an ordinairy Tuesday. In my defence: Lunch there is still cheap, good quality and affordable.  

This evening is for listening to 'Legend.' by Clannad. The theme CD from Robin off Sherwood. (A vintage tv show version off Robin Hood.) It's great music. It's vintage medieval style. What's not to love about it? And blogging a bit. If you can't have Spring out off itself, it's good to chase Springvibes a bit. Zaandijk is covered in daffodils these weeks so it seems. I think it's so nice they grow everywhere. Some people think they're a bit mainstream, but I love them siding the roads on the gras. Zaandijk is definetely the prettiest in Spring time. I can reccomend tourists to go in Spring if they wish to visit and see the place with daffodils and other flowers all over. It's pretty touristic, but if you really wish to visit for that antique 'Holland.' idea, go in Spring! 

I think it's just how you look at it. In my own Netherlands, it's often that 'boring old stuff all over again.' in my eyes. But when visiting Scotland a few years ago, I was like 'Whoa, I can't believe they really sell this awesome stuff in tourist shops.' Maybe it's how tourists look at us, but I doubt about it with our culture off cloggs, tulips and windmills. Scotland has cooler stuff in their tourist shops in my opinion. 

 It's cool stuff to give away as a present, though. My family thinks it's cool, and so does grandma and my cousins. I think it would be really nice stuff if I had friends or relatives abroad. Then I would really have something fun to send them, but I don't. I still don't have much people in my life. Except for family, fellow clients and neighbours who love me. 

I can't go too wild with presents these days, but I have been sending nice postcards to family previous week. Among which an Easter card with a cute baby chicken. Some people still send Christmas cards, but me, a card sender every so often, I even send Easter cards every year to my family. Usually short before Easter, but just one card to close family. (The people in my parental home.) Not to everyone, like I would do with Christmas. But just a fun card to the fam' every year. Yes, I'm a stubborn card sender. My family loves it. 

I was thinking, or it rather became a mindspin: What do we need during a crisis when trouble is big? Except for clothes and foods? If you can't guess: It's stuff for when we get sick. Like painkillers, (Paracetamol), tissues, a thermometer, cough medicine, and so on. I haven't been thinking about it before, but I tend to think I need to fix a medicine space somewhere. It might seem a bit weird when nothing is going on, but I probably will be gratefull to myself when I'm in bed with 40 degrees off fever. I'm not expecting another Corona pandemic, but just items you'd need when sickness hits you, when there's still a bit off money available for it. It's very handy, and a necessity in my opinion. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading!     

Good evening at the 20th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

This evening it´s raining cats and dogs. It´s soakingly wet outside, and the day was cloudy, depressing and grey. 

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Today was for baking three cookie spiced banana cakes. I have been making two common ones, and one in the shape off an Easter rabbit. 

Other than that, it has been the same grocery routine I follow every Monday. (The Easter Rabbit mold, by the way, comes from HEMA.) It's just that it has been raining today and it was a bit more depressing than the usuall. The banana cakes are for tomorrow games afternoon at de Boed, when they do a bingo with the clients. I have been making them becuase I had to get out off old bananas, and I thought the games afternoon would be the perfect occasion for banana cakes. I'm proud everything came out off it's mold perfectly. 

I filled my stock off baking supplies, but I thought it'd be scandalous how expensive everything is nowadays. It's not fun to bake anymore for a common household, or someone with diffrent purposes on their groceries than me. I have been capable to afford everything I needed today, but it was not cool for my supplies to have become this insanely expensive. I somehow believe everything will be even more pricey in the future. I'm so lucky I don't have a family to feed nowadays. And don't make these banana cakes the perfect gifts somehow to de Boed? I kept repeating it for myself: 'These are perfect gifts, I hope you realize.' To the problem I barely have money for gifts anymore. I don't have much to give, but I can bake for them. 

At least we can somehow celebrate the start off Spring with fresh banana cakes. And I'm lucky with it. We are not alone in this world. I still believe in sharing, somehow. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.   

Good evening at the 19th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today is grey, cold and cloudy. It's as dreary as the Netherlands can be. 

*

They all loved my appeltaart. I have made their day and it was a perfect idea. I hope it doesn't sound like over-acting to you. Most off the time I'm more down to earth when it comes to my own performance, but my appeltaart was perfect and I'm a pretty good home cook. It's always a good thing to make those people happy. It's such a warm feeling, also to myself, to help and make others happy. Buddha is right when it comes to that. 

I have plans in that field, actions off kindness. It's just that it's a crisis and I believe I don't have enough money to perform them. I wish to buy a multipack off laundry wash from a good brand (On a sharp discount) and donate it to de Boed's give away shop. And I wish to purchase a barbie princess doll and donate it to the PostNL action at Bruna's (A local bookstore) to help children who are poor to a birthday present. They have a donation bin where you can donate a present to a poor child. I would love that. It's just that I sound like a politician: A lot off promises, but when it comes to making things true, I can't or won't or simply don't do it. 

I can see myself having more financial space somewhere around May. It's not funny, but I'm barely capable to donate or give at the moment. I don't even have money for small presents for my brothers when I come to visit this Easter. A lot off people don't do it and wonder why I do so, but there was a time where I could buy my family small gifts when I went for a visit. I love giving gifts and I believe it's good to give. It's just that in this crisis, I can't even purchase key rings with a stuffed animal to them if I would like. Care takers told me that I should think off myself, and put myself first these days when it comes to that. I just don't like it. I love spontaneous, heartfelt, well-ment (small) gifts for people every now and then. 

I have send postcards recently, so I feel like I don't have to do that soon (I also love to send my family postcards every often.) Poststamps are ridiculously expensive. I still have a few. But it's something I put money from my pocket aside for to still be capable to buy them. Poststamps are important to me. Important enough to keep on buying them, still. I have send people cards and gifts recently. It's no desperate need, and I can hold it up untill May. Still, I don't like to have to be sober with gifts. I have an emergency fund recently, but it's purely ment for poststamps, or when something happens and I need a bit off money for it. It's not ment for funny gifts. It's not fun to have to save up from gifts for me! I think I will be glad when it's people's birthday and it's legid to really give people something. The first upcoming birthday is at the 19th off June, so I still have some time to save it. 

The next thing I'm going to save up from, is winter clothes for next year. I already know I'm going to wear the same sweaters and shirts from this year, and what my Christmas '23 outfit is going to be: It's previous year's outfit! Like I told my readers, it's possible to do Christmas on a budget if you really need to. Everything is insanely expensive. I think I don't do bad on it. I'm lucky my family is a Christmas Sweater family, and not the sparkly chique outfit kind off family. But that's concern for later. I purchased so much sweaters previous December, it's a crime not to re-wear them. 

Other than that, I have no reason to complain. I have a few Easter decorations in my home, and I have an Easter branch I decorated with items I had still 'on the shelves.' It's a bit spoiled if I would complain too much. I'm going to wear a nice (soft green) shirt I have been wearing for three Easters in a row this year to Easter, and I'm going to wear some nice pink sneakers under it I still have. It's not hard at all. And I look my Easter- best this year. It's a crime for me to complain. Except for those presents. But maybe I should not promise anything to anyone. So I won't make them dissapointed in anything. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

 

Good evening at the 18th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was sunny and bright for a day in pre-spring. It's beautifull outside. 

*

Today was for baking an applepie Dutch style. My messed up style. So, a bit off a mess on top instead off the classic fancy checkers. 

Still I decided it looks delicious, so it deserves a place on the internet. I'm already glad I didn't forget to eggwash this time. We will have it tomorrow with our afternoon coffee at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk, the Netherlands. I'm pretty happy with this easy applepie receipe and it's handy to have it on hand when apples are cheap and I wish to make something fast and simple yet delicious. 

Classic Dutch appeltaart divers from American applepie. It's therefore I use the term appeltaart for what we eat here.  

I wish to bake people happy at de Boed. It's a crisis, all off us are mental patients with little money on hand, we are having a hard time in general. So by baking people stuff with their coffee, I hope to cheer up their day. I'm not a professional baker and I can't make fancy bake shop stuff. Still I hope I bake people happy with what I make. And it's my hobby. It's fun to bake things and I'm told I'm good at it several times. So it serves more than one purpose for me. Every once in a while I make de Boed something. I just hope I can make people forget their trouble, and the crisis for a while when they eat this. Usually it has that effect on even the biggest crank. So somehow I feel I should continue with it. 

I can't decide what to bake next week yet. I know I have some cute easter rabbit wrappers, so it's probably a good idea to already make something Easter themed for my fellow clients. 

I believe we are not alone in this world, despite it being a crisis. It's good to help and share somehow if you can. I hope I'm not alone in that point off vieuw. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 15th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was pretty, sunny and warm spring weather. It's just been perfect for coffee in the sun. 

*

I had bad news from the results from my bloodtest. Warning, this will be a medical blog. 

The prolactine (A hormone which helps women produce mother's milk.) is way up the ceiling in my blood. It's that high I'm going to hear from the hospital about it. The mental health office contacted General Practice about it, but they send me through to the hospital. It explains the wobbly feeling I have. Prolactine is something pregnant women with babies or people on mental health medicine produce. I don't know why they put stuff in it that causes that, but it's every effin time the same old song. This time I seem to do well on this medicine. I'm not depressed, I'm as stable as possible, and I don't feel too absent when it comes to it- That's not true, I'm still pretty much absent and a bit on my own and distant, but that's me, my trauma and my reaction to the surrounding. Not the medication. 

The result is something to bale about. I feel worried and threatened and it makes me act weird. I'm out off controll on this situation. Say, 90% off medication has this effect. It's NOT funny when you're mental and in big need off these meds. I think most side effects on mental medication are not funny. We need them, but the pharmaceutic industry seems a bit retarded when it comes to side effects. I'm going to hear from the hospital about it. 

I wish I had a teddybear off a man to cuddle up to each night, and to hug and kiss me through this rough period. But I don't have a man. And like we know, that's no option at this moment. Still I wish I had someone to hold on to and hold hands with. I feel so scared. I know what I wish for, but I can't get it. Being really wealthy means being capable to be with the one you love during rough times. 

This Wednesday Soup day I made de Boed creamy celeriac soup with bacon stripes. And it was very tasty and very much appreciated. I put in a lot off herbs from the pantry, and garlic, and leek and onions. Aside to Boursin Cuisine and cooking cream. I finished with a splash off lemon juice after I pureed and then added the fried bacon stripes. People loved it. It's been made with beef broth. We where out off chicken broth. Even the most picky eaters liked it. 

I'm a bit out off control, which also makes me unstable somehow. In the worst case I have to switch medication- again. I'm not looking forward to that. It's been hard to get on these and I feel mentally as stable as possible with it. It's not funny. I hope you wish me luck with it. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 11th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone, 

This afternoon was pretty sunny, I had afternoon coffee in the sun. There's a forecast off more showers, whatsoever. The snow is gone so far. 

*

This morning was for baking this forest fruit syrup waffle pie. We will have it at our afternoon coffee at de Boed, community centre in Zaandijk. Aside to berry sauce, I decided to adjust syrup waffles to the filling. I hope the combination will be a succes tomorrow. It's a try out, but people at de Boed already believe it's going to be great. All my bakings are beloved among them. The icing sugar hides the lack off eggwash, (I forgot) and the messed up checkers on top. I had the berry sauce left over in my freezer, and thought it would make the perfect pie filling. The receipe for the dough comes from 'Appeltaart bij Janneke thuis.' by Janneke Philippi, but I adjusted vanilla extract and my own selected cookie spices to it. 

And offcourse the filling is no appeltaart, but broken syrup waffles on the bottom, and home made berry sauce, thickened a bit with cornstarch on top. Actuall appeltaart will be next week, snow or not. (If I can afford, otherwise it's going to be something else.) 

Sometimes it's a good idea not to eat the entire package off syrup waffles when you allow yourself one at Friday night. 😉 The day is sunny, but there's a promise off even more snow in the air, but I'm doing well.   

Allright, that's about it for now - 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 10th off March, 2023.

 Good evening everyone,

Today the Netherlands was shook up by a blizzard. It's snowing and it has been snowing the entire afternoon. The streets where covered in a layer off snow this afternoon. As if something yells at us: 'IT'S STILL WINTER!!!!!'  

*

This evening is for tea with a syrup waffle. It's snowing outside and ahead off me lays a weekend off doing little, except for baking a fruit pie, probably. I will do so on Saturday. I'm doubting wheter I will top it with checkers or do a pattern in the dough on top, with flowers done with a cookiecutter. The flowers will be a bit easier for me, since the checkers are always a little hard for me. I hope de Boed will enjoy my creation on Sunday. It's nasty weather this weekend, that simply asks for a baking. 

I decided, if next week will be snowy too, I will make de Boed a simple appeltaart (Dutch applepie) for next weekend. Nothing is as appreciated as that when the weather is bad. And practice a little with those checkers on top. Many a Dutch person can make it, I should be capable to do so too. Often I make myself away with it easy, by making apple crumble pie so no one will notice the lack off checkers. Next week I should owe up to it better, and simply give it a try. You never know. 

Somehow I expect the bad weather to last for some time. I'm thinking off not storing away my sweaters and goat wool socks untill I feel spring has truly started. Somehow untill after the first or second week off spring. 

Nothing is as sacred as my evening tea when the weather is all dreary like this. No matter how deep the crisis will be, I just have to have my tea in the evening. A simple heart enhancer, but it's good for mind, body and soul. And it's mind calming in the evening. 

Today was a bit boring. I had lunch with a left over off my mustard soup at de Boed, and I have been thinking out the Wednesday Soup for next week. Other than snow and seeking out soup receipes on the internet, little has happened. (Next week will be for creamy celeriac soup, with stripes off bacon.) 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.