Good morning at the 23th off December, 2023.

 Good morning everyone, 

Stormwinds and grey weather are blowing around the house. It's the dark days around Christmas. 

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I attempted at mom's, because I felt better from having Corona and care staff declared I was better. So I knew I could be there this Christmas. I feel as if I'm truly on a short holiday. I haven't been here for a while. Mom's place is cozy as ever, decorated with Christmas items and it's just a modest home, but for me, this is luxury these days. Especially not being alone and being surrounded by family does it. It's better than baking for de Boed. Somehow it's as if something's crawled underneath my skin and I just had the urge to be here instead. 

That happens to people who have a good bonding with their family: Oh, that urge to be there during Christmas! 

This year, I had a box off Lego gingerbread figures for my Brothers, and a Poinsetta plant for mom for Christmas. My mom loves plants. Poinsettas are the perfect choice off plant-gift for the holidays. And they're not expensive. Usually I give mom a plant or a bush off flowers when attempting there. It's a common gesture in the Netherlands. Or at least that's how I've been raised: When going to visit family, take something like that with you for them. Luckily the Netherlands is rich in flower shops with all kinds off nice floral and plant decorations. In all price ranges. So it's not appropriate to attempt somewhere empty handed. Or at least that's among my folks. And this year it makes a nice and appreciated Christmas gift. 

You don't have to when you visit each week for coffee and see each other very regulairly, (Though you still can bring a plant or small flower bush sometimes with you if you go to visit your friend or family. Like spring bulbes at the beginning off spring time. But usually not every time.) but if you go somewhere only once every while, a plant is a nice gesture. It's a habit among my family. 

It's almost Christmas, I have no big plans than just being here. I can be proud off myself this year for staying hygienic and groomed, especially because I did hard on that some time ago. It's been downright bad, but the problem seems solved and it's not much off an issue anymore. I can pass as clean and fresh again, finally. And I'm proud off myself. it's quite something for psychiatric patients to be filthy and unhygienic most off the time. But this last half a year, I maintained well in being more clean. I'm more aware off it, and I take better action on the issue. It's truly been a problem due to certain medication and depression. But now it's fine again, I think. It´s so important to be clean and hygienic during your entire life time. You can´t go without. I can be proud off myself again. 

I even have pedicured toenails with the matte baby pink nailpolish from the Essence 2023 advent calendar on them. Speaking off neat! I believe I should continue this way. Maybe it truly was the cause off healing easy from Corona this year. Hygene helps when you´re sick. I would like to go on being clean next year. It feels nice and much better than what it was. Changes in medication make such a diffrence. It´s a world off diffrence. It´s so sad when psychiatric patients are stigmatized due to hygene, but that´s how the world works. Everyone prefers to see clean people. I wish everyone would understand that. It´s not a standard for people to be washed and clean. (At least in my world) It should be. And sometimes it´s so hard due to being a psychiatric patient. I´m so proud off myself. I don´t know what it was, but it works. 

It´s 07.30, and it´s time for a second cup off coffee for this morning. 😉

Allright, that´s about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.