Good evening everyone,
Today was cold and gloomy with here and there an icy cold rainshower.
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Something got me up on my feet this evening. Usually I lay in bed pretty early, tired and sad. Trying to rest. But tonight something positive got me up again, it may seem silly, it may seem small, but it was the idea not to die too early and to be almost certain I'm going to live next half a year.
It may sound strange. But sometimes I'm certain I'm going to die early. Due to medication, or cramp itches inside my head. But today, I'm certain I'm not going to die.
The weather is still quite dreary, tomorrow it will be Blue Monday, and it's a negative overvieuw for the next couple off years. But at least I'm not going to die. It made me feel a tad more positive. Positive enough to get out off bed and start listening to music on YouTube and take a look on Pinterest this evening. And pour myself some tea. It may not sound like a lot, but the previous weeks, I have been in bed all the time in the evening. So to me, to be out on the couch like this, is quite something.
I still lend to the negative. I'm not really positive minded at the moment and the general feeling is gloomy. I'm close to my period. But something told me I'm NOT going to die. I worry about that. The feeling is almost as positive as more light and summer. Strange as it may sound.
Allright, that's about it for now-
Thank you for reading.
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