Good evening at the 11th off July, 2.

 Good evening everyone, 

The day is cooling down. It's been hot outside today but it's been bearable for me. 

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It's as if I have been cheering too early in being positive about grooming myself again. I slack in it again and I have been going around unwashed ever since Thursday. It's a bad thing and I think I will wash myself tomorrow evening. I told you how I want to keep things fresh in summer. It's a good idea, but mental health is in the way and I feel sweaty. 

I do wear a bit off make-up today, though. Eye-makeup with concealer and eyeshadows and mascara since I have been sleeping so incredibly bad tonight. It's been like one off these evenings again. I had such big circles this morning I was a bit shocked. I'm going to wash off the make-up before bed. Other than that I have to set myself to really wash myself. I have quit my skincare routine and it's been due to dark magic. Maybe they are extremely jealouse off my pretty face that they want to keep me from it being perfectly groomed and flawless. I keep them for it by now. (Actually I heared their voices trying to break my skincare routine a few weeks ago.) Black magic works on destructive feelings and jealousy.  

They decided to only hand me emergency medication every three days to keep me from using it too much. Emergency medication works well to sleep well and kill voices and thoughtpatterns temporarily. But it's addictive and you feel drowsy all day after taking it. I have been using it a lot lately so they try to moderate me by now. 

It's just that I can't sleep these days. Amisulpride makes more active on a daily base and somehow I think it's been heaping up in my system so I can't sleep at night like I used to for a while. It's been terrible these days. I wonder if the medication works at all for me. I think I shouldn't have put online about how important I think grooming and keeping clean for me is. 

It's not much off a habit among them to groom yourself well and wash. I think it's something they frown down upon a lot when it comes to me. Why would someone get such a nasty idea in their head? I asked them. 'Why would you do this? It's so low.' 'Earth and water signs do this the most. We must be very jealouse at each other for doing so.' It's literally what they said. 

I have been suspecting them off jealousy, and wrecking things for people off their disliking. It's as if there is a pattern in it I'm perfectly capable to see since I befall victim to it quite often. It's such a witches-trait to be jealouse all the time and wreck things for people out off that feeling. It doesn't make you a nice Pagan, or Wiccan, but a nasty witch from children's books if you take part in such happenings with your magic. 

I don't know if I should continue with this. It's not a healthy subject. I should watch my words with it online. It's a bad idea to share suspicion which can't be made into evidence. But somehow I see something suspicious happening. It's not for now to be shared. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.