Good afternoon at the 15th off April, 2022.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

the sky is grey and cloudy. At least it's not overly warm and there is a wind outside. On the other hand, there's no chance for sunbathing either but at least I can't burn today.  

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I'm at my parental home for Easter this weekend and I have been right to have been here two days ago due to trains not being off service this weekend. It's a bit scandalous for the railroad company not to be off service during the Easter weekend, but they wish to prevent crowded trains- but now there are no trains at all. Stupid. I'll be brought home by my mom's husband this Monday so I can count myself lucky. I'm among few. The lack off trains started already today. The railroad company isn't always the brightest light in the box. 

Mom mentioned I could do a bit more excercise and I think she is right about that. I could move my ass more outside and do a few more walks, or be more active in general but due to lack off motivation, it's hard. I do hard finding inspiration to move myself. 

My carrot soup was a succes. I made a fresh pot off carrot soup on milk base this Wednesday and though not everyone liked it, it was liked by most so we can speak off a succes for Wednesday Soup this week. I still had a bit off a sore throat but I decided Wednesday it was not bad enough not to make soup, and then spontaneously decided I wanted to visit my family that afternoon. So I made myself ready and got there. It seems my health complaints are gone now I'm here. 

I feel better in my parental home then at Gortershof. I have no choice but living there, but my old place seems so much more comfortable to me compared to where I live now. Life is easy here and there are no scary fellow clients who fight each other all the time. I hate that about life in psychiatry: other clients who are wayward all the time and who can be even dangerous. But that's why they're in. It's not easy. Maybe I should visit my family more often and allow myself more off time from where I live. I think I need that. I haven't visited them for about two months ever since the end off January due to medication switching and that was hard for me. I feel like I can breathe a bit more here. Like said so many times before: I need fresh air and (mental) space to breathe. 

I also have good news: Sleep seems to have improved since two weeks. Often I was on about how I was doing so incredibly hard having good sleep, but now I make better nights. Maybe it's been that Ladybug Guardian Angel after all who helped me. And maybe it's been him helping me with my sore throat. My sunburn is also gone by now. Nothing is as sacred as good sleep. So it's nothing but a good thing to sleep well. Let's hope this will last. 

I also seem to loose weight due to medication switching. My clothes fit more easy on me and that has been why this entire thing has been set up: To loose weight and stop gaining it as it was becoming dangerous for me to have grown this fat because off it. I'm so glad it works. I deserve that, weight loss and getting back to a size where I can fit in most clothes again. Finally, after all those hard years. I have always believed in that somehow. That one day something about my medication would change and I would become an acceptable size again. I just wished for it. I think I can help it a little extra by excercising more. It's been a good step, whatsoever for my health. 

Allright, that's about it- 

Thank you for reading.