Good evening at the 22nd off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was somewhat cold, but the evening is sunny changing with clouds. 

*

Sometimes, dreams still come true. Despite little money, despite little possibilities, sometimes we can make small things come true if we attempt them ourselves. An example? The squared bundt mold by Nordic Ware! I purchased it. 💖 It's been expensive, but priceless. 

I have this small ambition to bake items in excentric shapes. I think this fits the idea perfectly, but now to work with it... 

I hope nobody will come after me for purchasing such expensive items. I still seem to can. Due to savings throughout my lifetime. And I don't do other crazy things with money. So I can afford things like this. Other people visit festivals or smoke, I do these kind off things. Aside to cookbooks and this, I have no other hobbies. Still I realize very well it's luxury in these times to practice a hobby. I think I'm very lucky with it. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good afternoon at the 22nd off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today it's cold for a day in Spring. 

*

I had some time and energy on hand this afternoon, so I baked a raisin  cake on an old fashioned tray which I found at de Boed's give away shop: 

The serving tray was for free, and I wanted to use it for some time, but I had no opportunity. de Boed is lucky I had the materials and time left for this. It's for their tomorrow evening coffee. 

I stuff my raisin cake with 500 grams off raisins, and not a gram less. It's well stuffed and delicious that way, with plenty off raisins in each slice. Aside from raisins, I dusted it with icing sugar. And people love it when it's this old fashioned. Since they are a little err, you know... 

I think it goes in well on a cold Tuesday evening. With a nice cup off coffee. 

I can be proud off myself I cleaned the kitchen afterward, and I did this anyway. I feel depressed, moody and tired. But this gave me something nice on hand. It's probably the cold that gives me that mood. It's pretty cold for the Netherlands in April, it even has been freezing last night. Maybe raisin cake works as a mood enhancer tomorrow evening. Who knows. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 18th off April, 2024, 2.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was aside from changing and cloudy, pretty cold. 

*

Caretakers and fellow clients all agree I should do as I please, but somehow I feel too much baking is inappropriate during this difficult war-era. They said I should call it my 'Peace cookies.' And they dedicated songs to it during music afternoon. I think they just want to eat my bakings. 

But something in me whispers in it's a bit 'wrong.' To do excessive baking during this era. Where it's more neat to behave inside the lines. I'm not the person to challenge fate by excessive baking during this era. It's not appropriate, and somehow I feel I should store my pretty molds untill peace truly breaks out and there is something to celebrate, finally, again. Nowadays it's so hard. I think off not over-doing it when it comes to baking these days. But that's my opinion. It's a bit greedy, over- doing it while most seem to have not much. 

But when will these days be over, and we are likely to allow ourselves baking like a princess again? That's hard to answer. I don't expect peace in the short term, but I don't expect it to last very long either. Do I have to store my Nordic Ware forever, then? It's hard, it's tempting, but it's also a bit too spoiled to bake like a princess these days. Where during Corona, nothing was crazy enough, nowadays I rather feel like holding my breath a bit. But that was a diffrent time, when money and resources wheren't so spare and expensive. 

Sad for everyone who wishes to eat 'peace cookies.' (I should make an exception, and see if there aren't cookie cutters with the peace sign.😉) But I feel like behaving a bit when it comes to baking.  

And, I decided on to donate more toothbrushes and toothpaste. I'm donating a box off toothpaste tubes and a box off toothbrushes in steps to the give away cabinet down the hall. (One off each one by one.) I really think I helped some poor people to a fresh breath. I don't have to hold back donating like I believed before. It's only good intentions and good Karma for me when it comes to that. It's such a great feeling when I can give . And it's unisex. Both men and women can use it. It's good to give, I truly believe that. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.    

Good evening at the 18th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was mostly cloudy. 

*

This morning was for not swimming, since I had an in between bleeding. Something that can happen to some females. I missed out on swimming, and I did not like. I love to swim every week. 

I did not miss out on the Thursday music afternoon. I love to sing along with the music care taker that comes every week to make music with us. They play guitar, and we sing along with widely known songs from printed lyrics they hand out to us. 

I think it's healthy to sing out loud every often for most people. To sing out loud is very healthy. Some people should do so more often. It can be healthy for your heart and your soul. People here sing old songs a lot. I love it. It makes people more loose when they sing more. Less tied to their obligations. It's a whole lot off fun in my opinion. 

 

 

Tonight was for 'Spaghetti Rossi.' with home made tomato sauce from fresh tomatoes from the market. It was a try out from the Pasta Bible. It was pretty healthy, and wholesome. I had an orange for dessert. When I have to prepare my own food, I prefer to eat healthy, so it seems. 

It's exhausting to prepare my own food every night. I have to get used to it again. I think I will take it easy this weekend. Not too heavy, not too difficult. Sometimes we have to take count people can't handle much, actually. Same counts for me. I can do a lot off things, and I have a lot off plans. But I have little energy due to medication. So, I have to take it easy when it's too much for me. I have to take count off my bad health and my low energy level. I don't have too much obligations, so I think it's no big deal doing so. As far as that goes, my only obligation is to keep the kitchen clean. If they don't want me to do so immediately, I can. I don't have much obligations, And still life is tiresome. But weekends don't have to be hard when it comes to food. I think I will be capable to handle it. 

 Sometimes I make it hard on myself, by wishing to keep this home tidy. I got complimented on the clean floor by a lot off people. 'The secret is to vacuum and mop every week.' I tell them. A lot off people don't mop. But it's an absolute must for a groomed floor. When it comes to that, I'm glad with my household help who reminds me every week. I mop my floor myself. While she vacuums. If this home wasn't messy, it would almost be spic and span. It's something to be proud off. Maybe I'm concealing something with this behaviour, but I think by the end off this difficult time, I can either be proud off myself, or look back a bit annoyed for me walking in line so well. For now, I think I can be proud. What am I to proove? I have no idea, but for now I just think I'm tired. Very tired from an attempts in good housekeeping. I don't know if it's for a form off pride, or just for myself. All I know is that I just try. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 16th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was mostly rainy and cold. 

*

I quit the deal with mom, not because I could not handle it, but because I have enough money to make it without her help. I can come round without her. I'm still thinking on moderately taking it sober, but simply not rock bottom, like first. If I use my mind, I can live comfortable. How? Since I have always lived sober, and now I have small savings. I should not cheer too early, and see what's within my range off possibilities. But I used my head, and now I'm allowed to profit from it. Even though this is a crisis, I believe I can handle it for now. Though I can not 'vreet on lobster.' like I wanted to do after the crisis, and only during Christmas. But it's comfortable enough to save myself. 

So I quit the deal with mom, and saved myself from a very sober and plain life. Like stated in her demands before she allowed me it. 

The hard and sober mindset I'm used to, saved my ass. There's nothing wrong with being Dutch during a crisis. It saves my life. And I always loved the plain old fashioned style that's in fashion nowadays. There's nothing wrong with it these days. Sometimes life seems to smile at me a bit, and these hard years seemed to have had purpose. I can deal with it, even without a man. It's even preferable without a man. 

But it's not over yet. But so far, so good. As far as that goes, I decided to complete the cooking bible series and continue cookbook collecting. Other than that, I prefer to take on it pretty normal. 'You never know what lies ahead off you.' Hasn't done wrong for me so far. 

Note: It doesn't mean I let anyone borrow, or that I will donate more than the average. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good evening at the 14th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was sunny and bright outside. A nice day in Spring. Not too hot, but nice. 💖

*

Today wasn't too bad. I decided to visit the give away shop every often. I'm on a tight budget these days, and second hand items from the give away shop are welcome. They're all pretty nice, and off good quality. So I think it's allright to use them. There's nothing wrong with good second hand items when you're on a budget, and especially in these expensive times, people should not feel ashamed off it. It's an outcome to me. 

Aside to the walk to the give away shop and charging my traveling card, I spend my afternoon in the sun at de Boed's terrace. With a cup off coffee. It's still free to sunbathe on days like this. I love it. The ordinairy people off old Zaandijk are as poor as the streetbricks, but we can still enjoy the sun and the surrounding and be outside in spring and summer. The surrounding is lovely. 

It's a headache to puzzle how to come round with my groceries next week, but I think that's for everyone. 😉 For ordinairy people like me, it is. I wish to cook healthy but affordable. It's puzzling. 

The outcome off tonight for dinner was fried egg with tomato on toasted brown bread with ham. 

I heard in egg there is all nutritions we need and three off them a day is a healthy choice. Covered with tomatoes, this is healthy. I think I'm fine eating this. 

For now, I'm at my couch with a pot off green tea. Maybe I should skip to redbush tea if that's more affordable. It's healthy, too if it's true. Especially if I'm so thirsty for (healthy) tea. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.    

Good evening at the 13th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was a sunny and warm day in the Netherlands. To a point where the weather was agreeable and nice. 

*

The repair cafe fixed my Soup Bible with duct tape. 

I'm capable to work from it again, but it isn't what you would call 'nice repaired.' It's not broken anymore, but it's kinda a lump way off repairing. And I have to do it with this. I don't have money for a new one. But it's fine with me. This book has battle scars after such a long service in my Wednesday Soup kitchen. I ended my Soup Kitchen, Since I don't lunch at de Boed anymore. The Soup Bible is fixed with duct tape and has my name written on it's cover so they could see it was mine. Aren't those battle scars? I gave my Soup fans a good time eating all off my soups. What a journey, with one year off a break. But my soups where that missed, I decided to pick up on it again, untill de Boed decided to quit it's meals. It's no longer picking a soup each week, neither this or my own thought out receipes. It's all done. I somehow feel it. All that work, all that experience... .I never had a job in my entire life, but I had a Soup Kitchen every week. 

I think I'm going to miss it. I liked it. And paople loved it. 

I can hear my oldest younger brother mock about how it's repaired with duct tape, and it looking cheap ass. (My brother thinks I'm cheap.) But it's a book with a story. I think that's what matters. What an experience, what a volunteer job! I need a moment for this. Maybe a lot off time to process it. It's been a lot. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 10th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today happened to be beautifull and sunny. 

*

This was my salad this afternoon: 

With a fried potato mess and a chicken burger, and a dot off mayonaise. It's not perfect potatoes, but it's been tasty. 

And I happened to have a thought. 'The World' as how we thought it was, seemed invincible. We thought nobody could wreck or demolish The World. But what seemed indestructable, has been destroyed so easily by these times and war. How is it possible for The World not to win this war? To re-arange it's bills and to solve this entire mess? What seemed so strong, has been blown away like an empty card house. People are poor, Ukraine is destructed and we have no clue if we will ever see diffrent these days. 5 years ago, around 2019, nobody could have thought that We would be destroyed so easily. But what's been build up by then, is as good as destructed. 

Can it be solved? Can The World re-pack itself and save it's ass? good old World... It's never been more needed than nowadays for people to show their guts. This country is 'Naar de klote.' According to most. Ask someone, and they say 'Dit land is naar de klote.' (Translated: 'It's on it's ass.') And it's about time to stop with that circus and get something solved by now for once. But how to? I'm not the only one fed up with the situation. But how can ordinairy people solve this mess? And does this come from a power behind the power, if there is some to begin with? How to save the world, and the Netherlands, and become indestructable once again? But now for real? How much more do they want us to owe up for? And what do we see back from it? It's on it's flat ass, but now - to solve it.- but for real? Or do we want to live in this trap forever? What do we need to make happen, to simply solve it? Both in the long and short term. Maybe I should mind my own business, and government work wasn't good for me, but I know a mess when I see one. How the hell are we going to solve this? 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good morning at the 10th off April, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

It's still dark outside, it's 05.42 AM, but it's kinda chilly this morning. 

*

I'm going to do one off the things I enjoy most: I'm going to visit a street market. I painted my nails black and put my hair in a ponytail, and I paid attention to my clothes. I'm wearing cute light grey boots for example. Markets are a perfect spot for food bargains. I love that. And it's crowded in a cozy way. I know what I'm going for, basic salad vegetables. Cucumber, tomatoes and lettuce. I'm going to boil eggs with it tonight and put a basic dressing over it and then I have a basic salad, but with picture perfect market vegetables. Easy as pie, but it's supposed to be delicious and remember what I said about bragging about perfect fresh vegetables in simple dishes: This is going to be an example off it. I'm a fresh food loving girl. I love the health benefits off it. You wouldn't say it since I'm obese, but that's not fair and it's medication in my case. But I love good (Real) foods with perfect health benefits. 

I would like to grow at least 90 years old. I can't explain why that is, but I have the ambition to grow perfectly old for a Dutch woman. Maybe I'm living in the wrong area, since this industrial factory place is known for it's many cancer deaths. But maybe I can escape that fate and do grow a bit old. I'm only 31. But the idea off growing very old is a dream off mine. Maybe I regret later on. 'To grow old seems wonderfull, but to be old...' like the old people say. Maybe it's because I'm surrounded by old people, in a vintage town. And I would like to become old myself. And maybe life will be good when I'm in my golden years. But that's for later on. Let's purchase some market vegetables first. 😉 

My coffee machine is pruttling, I even sprayed some rose scent behind my ears. I'm typing you this while my nailpolish dries. Maybe I'll upload a picture off my meal later on. The morning is promising today. 💖   

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading 

        

Good evening at the 8th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was moderate for a say in spring. It wasn't too cold but it was changing clouds with clear skies. 

*

de Boed has decided on not to provide us meals each day anymore. I have to move my ass for them myself nowadays. I have to say, good grief, they take up a lot off energy. I started ahead to the date they actually quit. Simply to be ahead off it and see if I can manifest some meals myself. I have to. 

It takes up a lot off energy. But tonight was for fresh, home made vegetable soup. With beef broth, vermicelli and home made meatballs. 

I had it with half a French bread. It was yummy, I had two bowls off fresh soup. I did the thing right. With lots off onion, garlic, thyme and laurel. I had two mandarins for dessert. 

Maybe, when this crisis is over, I can snob towards other millenials about how I still ate fresh fruits and vegetables during the crisis. It's not a vision, merely a silly thought. I long to cook classic Dutch meals, but in a way it tastes perfectly, with fresh vegetables, preferably. Potatoes, vegetables and meat, but well-cooked and picture perfect fresh. The way I would totally spoil myself with it. It's doable that way to eat fresh veggies and fruits. But please take note I don't smoke, I don't drink, I barely snack, I don't have kids and I don't have pets. I just have fresh mandarins from the local market for dessert. That's my big luxury for today. 😉 And I side it with tap water. (In the Netherlands, it's safe to drink. And it comes out off the tap for free.) No (Expensive) soft drinks for me. 

And it takes a lot off effort. For example: 

I ate this last weekend, and carrots and peas are supposed to be from a jar, but mine where fresh cut carrots and peas from the freezer, and fresh stamped potato stamp. Brought to taste with butter, milk, salt and pepper. The meat was, err, on a discount. But my vegetables and potatoes where perfect. 

Maybe I'm just crazy for wishing to eat like that. I make a total snob out off myself this way. It's not the most cheap way to eat. But who knows. Maybe later after the war and the crisis, when I'm old, I can brag to fellow millenials how my food was perfectly fresh during this era. I should not over do it. It's just plain meals, but cooked well. 

We didn't have much welfare during this mediocre era, so who knows I can be a total snob about my food still being fresh during this era. In this area, (The Zaan-region) fresh means perfect. Almost decadent and wealthy. Despite the dishes being plain. And they still love the grandma age. So what I do is decadent and luxurious for my age group here. Though on Sunday I had an Oetker mushroom pizza. And it was fine for that day either. 

Maybe it's pure idiocy, And I don't know who I am to brag about it when I'm a decadent old hag. Maybe I have no friends when I'm old, and I will be all alone. Sometimes I think I work too hard these days for house keeping. And what for? It's day-filling, but it's a necessity. I think I do so for my pride. This morning, I cleaned the bathroom like each week. Though the rest off the home is a mess. I simply have no energy for it, but I keep the kitchen clean and tidy. It's progress. For my small doing and in my world, it's progress. But it's exhausting to be onto it each day. Maybe I have to get used to it. A woman's work is never done they say, unemancipated as it sounds. But at least I have no ungratefull man besiding me. I just do it for my own pride and well-being. 

There's no money left for fun baking, but I spend all my energy to ordinairy cooking these days. And it's the crisis. No expensive baking projects from me soon on here, that's simply not possible for now on my budget. And I can't share as much as I would like. I have to keep everything myself from now on. There's no space anymore for sharing. 😒 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good evening at the 4th off April, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

This morning was incredibly rain and this afternoon was changing sunshine with clouds. I caught a few sun rays on my face at coffee time. 

*

It counts for kitchenware, but if you don't throw books on the floor, they also live longer... I threw my beloved Soup Bible on the floor by accident.... Now it's all wrecked, loose covers, and torn through at the Morrocan Harirra page. It's terrible. I'm about to bring it to the Repair Cafe. 

This is what it looks like now. It's just too terrible. I placed it on my shelve, and then it fell off. It's a pity even more since I need it for Wednesday Soup almost each week. But next week it's going to be at the Repair Cafe, and I hope they can fix it. One off the headlines to this week came from the Soup Bible. Egg-plant soup with cheese and home made basil oil. 

And I had it being topped with rocket lettuce on top. It was very good. I made basil oil for the first time in my life, though I adjusted a ton off more garlic to the basic receipe. 

This is my take on home made basil oil. I adjusted all off it to the soup, and the result was perfect. It smelled and tasted like Italian heaven. It's just that I adjusted about 7  fat cloves off garlic instead off only one. The basic for it came from The Soup Bible. It's just that it's torn apart, and I hope they can fix it. I happen to have no money for a new one at the moment. I made the soup by taking a picture off the receipe. And reading from my phone. I hope I'm lucky there's a repair café at the first floor off de Boed every Saturday. They fix items for free, but I think it's nice and appropriate to reward them with a pack off 'gevulde koeken.' if they succeed. (Dutch stuffed cookies to side their coffee.) 

Another headline off this week is the old fashioned semolina pudding I made with my Nordic Ware pan. The Nordic Ware 6-cup Heritage bundt pan. It's extremely expensive. But I loooove Nordic Ware. And something in me wanted to have it, aside to it's brother, the normal size Heritage Bunft pan. I used berry syrup as it's sauce. Traditional Dutch Semolina pudding is eaten with berry sauce. But I just had syrup for it. 

And a nice slice off it on a perfect serving plate for pudding. I still had that in my closet. Plates can withstand times if you don't... err, well, if you don't treat them like I did with the Soup Bible. On purpose or by accident. 😉 

What am I to do if they can't fix my Soup Bible? 😢 

I take pride in varying with high-quality, outstanding soups every week. Now I have to take it a little less creative and do with what I can prepare by heart. These weeks I wanted to take more inspiration from the Soup Bible, for variation sake. But I hope people don't mind about creamy mustard soup again. And it's an expensive book. I liked I still had it after the crisis broke out. And still working out off it, despite nowadays it might have been too expensive for me to collect. I can't purchase these books so thoughtless anymore like before. To still work out off them is priceless, however. 

And it's a hardcover. You'd expect it to be capable to take a fall from a shelve. I hope the Repair Cafe can help me out with this. 😟 To be continued.... 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

   

Good morning at the 2nd off April, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

Today was forecasted to become cloudy and cold. 

*

I had a morning 'cleaning the bathroom.' rush. At times, I feel the energy to get out off bed early to clean the bathroom before life takes place, around 5 AM. The rest off the day I usually don't have much time, and it's a great feeling it's done that steady that early in the morning. I cleaned the sink and the toilet. The other aspects aren't cleaned, but the most important parts are clean for this week. It's important to keep the bathroom clean each week. Now is for a rest on the couch with a cup off green tea. I came home from my parental home yesterday. 

Second day off Easter at de Boed was nothing. Due to lack off staff. Fellow clients had a hard time during Easter. I can count myself lucky my family is still alive. And dinner was cale stamp for us yesterday. Not much off a festive Easter dinner. But we are not allowed to complain. They tell us 'we should be gratefull there is food to begin with.' When someone even dares to speak up their mind. It's kinda hard. 

Maybe I should seek for something to be truly gratefull for, or happy with for today during a time where money is spare. And we better look at what we still do have, instead off looking at what we don't have in life. For now I'm glad with a clean toilet and a pot off green tea in the morning. Both are bliss on Tuesday morning, to be honest. And there will be fresh coffee at de Boed like every morning. There to be coffee every day for us is a blessing. Coffee is over- the - moon expensive for ordinairy people, but we can enjoy it at de Boed. I speak the truth when I say I'm gratefull every day for my free daily coffee with milk. That's the good things about this morning. I don't have much money, and I can't spend much anymore, but there's good in every day. Let's hope I will keep on seeing it. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.          

Good morning at the 1st off April, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

This morning it's cloudy and rainy. 

*

This morning after medication is the third time this weekend I overpainted my nails with 577 Cream Supreme by IsaDora. I let them dry while typing a blog. I learned to let your nails dry by typing, (A blog for example) is the best way to let them dry in a way that's not boring. My hands and nails looked tidy and will look tidy this evening during the second day off Easter meal at de Boed. Though Cream Supreme is not an Easter colour, but it's a cool 90's nude. It can pass for today. 😁 It's super cool for my hands to look this lady-like this Easter. 

Today is April fool's day, and second day off Easter in the Netherlands. Who are you gonna prank by letting them sit on an Easter egg? 😉 I myself will probably behave myself. This weekend at mom's felt like an Easter vacation. I feel like to have come to rest here. I made a few walks around  the surrounding and watched some sweet movies with mom. And her company felt great. 

On Friday I visited grandma, and gave her a large box off chocolates. Zaandijk has one pittoresque chocolate shop, run by a hobbyist who made her dream come to live and who makes hand made chocolates. She's perfect at it and my family loves them. They're the perfect gifts. It's just that she's going to retire next year (2025) in June. Her chocolates are my mom's favourite. But she doesn't has a successor, and the shop will be closed by then. But she makes the best chocolates. 

Back on main topic, grandma enjoyed my visit. I don't visit weekly, but when I attempt at mom, I visit her. (They live in the same place.) It's important and good to do nice things for your grandparents when they are still alive. I started to feel like that about it at some point, and now I try to do nice things for her more often. I send sweet postcards, and I visit more. She appreciates that. 

This afternoon, I will head back to Zaandijk. Easter wasn't so bad. It was cozy and nice. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.