Good evening at the 27th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was clear and cold outside, winter sunshine. 

*

Migration, it's quite an issue. I barely dare to burn my fingers on it, but I wish to state and share an opinion with you. 

The Dutch government was elected the PVV, the anti-migration party from Geert Wilders. They would like to cut migration and foreign workers to enlarge chances for Dutch workers. It's just that ASML, the country's most renovated chip machine maker and other knowledge sectors are starting to complain. I think there is nothing wrong with well-mannered, high educated, hard working foreign workers. We need them and we should not cut them from the Dutch job market. Ever since the VOC-era, the Netherlands depends on them. When it comes to such immigrants, we should not put a thing in their way since they might help us develop engineering which might help us win the war against Russia. I think during this war, the government should not lay ASML and other technological companies anything in the way to develop since we need it. We need it as much as electricity to keep our society up to date and working. Especially during a big war being on. 

It's not bad for such companies to invest in foreign university campuses and wishing to bring in the most brilliant and talented minds in the whole wide world to help them develop. 

These people are not scum. The PVV is talking about criminals and foreign fortune seekers, but that's a whole diffrent kind off people in my opinion. There's a diffrence between well-educated workers and foreign scum. 

I'm not racist, I think most people deserve a fair chance, but the country is simply full. I agree on that point. It's sad, but we can't keep any more asylum seekers. Since this country is waaaay too small for all those refugees and we already do what we can. But we should NOT and NEVER cut on knowledge immigrants and people who wish to work their ass off over here. It's much too important for the economy, improvement and during this era, warfare. I think I'm not that much off importance, but I wished to state that opinion somewhere. I haven't voted PVV, and I think they will do the country harm if they continue this way. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good afternoon at the 24th off January, 2024.

 

Good afternoon everyone, 

Today it's clear and very windy outside in the Netherlands. 

*

Mind this face, this is minimal make-up nowadays, and I would like to declare it 'crisis fashion.' I saw this style off make-up in a clear vision, off a video where all decades off the 21st century where lined up in the most populair items off those decades. It focused on our decades since it was very diffrent from the average blonde pretty stuff I saw. It said this was THE make-up off 2027 and on, untill 2032. It's classic eyeliner-flick, mini mascara, classic red lipstick, a warm tint off foundation, thick and groomed eyebrows and that's about it. And the cool blonde hairshade. No light blonde, it fell out off tune since the Belle off this era wore a natural shade. No excessive eyeshadow or liner artworks like before and after. Just, classic, modest and minimal, since we're in a crisis and a war. It means the war will still be on during 2027. I have the idea we're (The European Union) going to fight if it lasts untill after 2025. When planets are transferred to Aries. 

I think Utillity work-wear is going to be it for the next crisis and war decade for women. I've drawn the woman with my own shade off eyes. (Blue-green) 

The lipstick was furthermore remarkable, since it was one which only costed 7 euro's each. Compared to what other make-up can cost, it was sure something to beware off. It's a bright red one which probably still has to make it on the market. And it was not off good quality. 

Since I saw minimal make-up and this hairtone in fashion everywhere, I got this vision stuck in my head. Maybe I should mind you about it. 

I think I'm not going to grow old enough to watch the future video about this era. But it also makes me know it won't last forever, and some day in the future we will see a fashion change. But we're only at the beginning off this sober one. Women beware, people beware. We're going to be deep into this shit. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good afternoon at the 21st off January, 2024.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

It's on the edge off storm and very cold winter weather in the Netherlands. It's dreary and cold, and it started to wind. 

*

It's January, and life is depressing as a doorknob at the moment. What is the best solution to withstand it all? To Winter! 

I'm wintering this season in comfortable Norwegian knits, with vanilla scents and an after-Christmas feeling. I told you how my Christmas vacation wasn't much off a succes, but to truly Winter is a succes. It works with Norwegian knits which are a little off the Christmas colour scale and are not too sparkly, and warm vanilla scents I have left over from Christmas. And a hint off neutral make-up from a Christmas eyeshadow pallet. It lacks the Christmas lights, but everything to it's own and this is not Christmas. It's to Winter. It's to get over with the dark and drearyness off this season. Warm and cozy as it is. 

There's still snow on the streets, and ponds and waters are frozen stiff. January is very well suitable as a month to finish Christmas left-overs. (Offcourse not the food, but some sweaters, scents and make-up are suitable.) Whoever keeps what, has what. Though I purchased these Norwegian knits on an after-Christmas discount. 

Globally seen, in my home the feeling off Christmas can last from half November untill February if it's needed. It's what we need to survive these dark and dreary months. Stone cold as it is. I believe there's nothing against it. It's actually very cozy and nice. Maybe it's an idea for you. To after-Christmas winter these cold months. Maybe you can stand the cold a bit better that way. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.   

Good evening at the 20th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today it's cold and clear in the Netherlands. It's cold but the weather is not too bad. It's perfect for Norwegian Knits today. I'm wearing a bright yellow and white one. today 

*

Somehow I suspect prices not to enlower when the war ends. This crisis could have a nasty tail for people who think too optimistic. I wish to warn you all about the possibility for Europe / the NATO to truly get into a fight with Russia either. Without United States- support and help, it will be a laugh for Russia which we are NOT likely to win. We will get out off it, but I think we will still be as poor as the ancient streetbricks in this old fashioned town. 

I personally hoped we would get rich again, so I could bake and cook more fancy, and more often. But be aware this whole 'increased prices-thing.' might last a bit too long. Don't think it will be over too soon. It's a bit more than simply 'gritting your teeth.' And indulge on Brussle sprouts, this war-thing is going to be big, long and traumatic. Maybe I'm even a bit too optimistic when I say 2028 will be the war's end. And 2032 will be the crisis' end. Be aware, try to prepare. 

I think the world is getting into a massive collective trauma over this era. And the government should do more for all those poor people. To build homes for everyone to begin with, and then fight it out with the farmers. But homes should be their top-priority for now. 

I had the nightmare our former president wanted to get elected for president again. It was such a bad dream. Everyone thinks he has blown up, he was a drama for the Netherlands for 12 bad years. They voted him off last year, but in my nightmare he came back. 

My own personal dream to vreet on lobster during Christmas and home made strawberry tiramisu during summer is not likely to happen soon. Donna Hay can catch a layer off dust on my shelve. It's going to be nasty and bad these years. And I wish the United States would not be so difficult about it and simply stand by and help. With them, we would win this war. Without them, we will not and it's that simple sometimes. 

Tomorrow we'll have storm Isha over us in the Netherlands. I had a care worker named Isha some time ago. I found he did his job pretty well. He doesn't deserve a storm named after him. 

We had quite some storms lately. But this storm is going to last untill Tuesday if we're not lucky. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.    

Good afternoon at the 18th off January, 2024.

 Good afternoon everyone, 

Today it's freezing, cold but sunny in this part off the Netherlands. At least we're not covered in snow. 😉

*

My father would have turned 71 today. Unfortunately, he died in 2012. Aged 59. This evening I decided to share a bundt cake due to the occasion, but that's for a previous weblog. 

Maybe I make you wonder, often I share old fashioned music, my style is classic, I have a taste for the old fashioned. But would I prefer to live in the era off the 1930's-1960's ? Actually I don't. 

I love it and I lean towards it, but my freedom as a modern woman, my rights, the sense off not being oppressed in any manner are much more important to me. Homophobia and racism where much more accepted in those days. Which is not to my acceptance. If I would have lived by then, I would have died in some sort off mental institute instead off being free. Or I would have been forced to be a housewife my entire life. So, no thanks to that. But the style is nevertless beautifull and very comforting to me. It's a style I thankfully borrow during a more modern, free era. Where I am a free person with rights and freedom to choose. 

I can be a mental feminist, wearing pants, sweaters and thick glasses and do as I please most off the time. Not plucking, shaving, looking ungroomed and being murdurously fat is much less off an issue nowadays. Aside to misbehaving and having an opinion. So, no- I love the style and the class off that era, but I would never want to live in it. And it's my freedom to think so and share that opinion with you nowadays. 😉 Let's hope it will stay that way. And we will always be free to have and share our opinion.  

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good afternoon at the 17th off January, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

According to the news, the countries surrounding us are covered in snow. But this part, the western part off the Netherlands, escaped the blizzard and all seems well here for now. 

*

Tomorrow my dad would have turned 71. He died in 2012, at the age off 59. He was very sick. Fought heart and lung diseases for quite long. Simply to memorize him tomorrow, I have baked a simple and classic humble bundt cake, which came picture perfect out off it's mold, and let it being dust off with icing sugar pretty well: 

I didn't want to go overboard with it for tomorrow since it's still a crisis we live in. Maybe a 1950's home maker would have done it this way either. Though the bundt mold I used is not classic. Still I think it's fine and appropriate enough for a day like tomorrow. Perfectly suitable for the situation. Even though it's a crisis, I think my dad deserves a cake. Even though it's not the best I can. It comes from a good heart. Somewhere in between 'crisis.' and 'somewhat festive.' This can be found. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.   

Good evening at the 16th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

This morning the streets and the roofs where covered in snow. It's been cold and cloudy today. 

*

I think I must have been cheering a bit too early two days ago. I felt so well, I decided to stay out off bed in the evening. Listening to music, watching movies on Netflix. It's a period where people and animals die in my close surrounding, that very evening. I have been cheering too early. I still feel like I want to be out off bed in the evening instead off being in bed depressed all the time very early. Or is it truly depression? 

I manage my days well. It's just that I'm so winter-tired in the evening. It's strange how I watched cute video's off kitties on Pinterest when my cat died. Especially cute tuxedo kittens. I thought about him that evening. It's hard. 

It's quite the January, and I'm dealing with a gloomy and somber feeling. The weather doesn't work with either. Tomorrow there will be a blizzard according to the forecasts. Now it's said it's 'just in the south.' Where it was the whole country at first. We'll see. I think it's a good idea to watch the news ahead to this blizzard to be informed about it. 

I feel sad and I'm doing hard. I informed everyone here about Tom, I talked about him and his death, but it's still very hard. And one off my elder neigbours came to pass. It was an elderly man in his 70's who was quite someone around this neighbourhood. He fought against darm cancer, but lost. And my friend the old Zoo keeper is sick. So we hadn't have the chance to have coffee yet. He was very good friends with the old man who died, so I expect him to be in big mourning. I think I will wait untill he's fine again. Like Waldorf & Stantler from the Muppets they where. Quite the phenomena to comment to people and situations at de Boed and the terrain. It's a loss for the entire terrain he's gone.  Though he wasn't my friend. 

And my period broke through, I'm firmly bleeding, and I expect that will hold on the entire week. 

It's 'such' a week, with cold, losses and a period. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

Good evening at the 15th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was for winter showers off rain, hail and snow. 

*

I got him in 2013. He was a Tuxedo cat, black and white, handsome, playfull and my mom got me him after my old cat died. She named him Tom. Back at the time I was attempting a study which I failed. I tried my best to raise him. He was quite a hand full and a bit naughty, but I felt we could figure it out somehow. 

But then Schizophrenia hit me quite hard, and I had to be in the mental hospital during the stage where kitties get attached to their owners. Say, November / December 2013. Luckily my younger brother took on him so well. I had failed life after getting out off the mental hospital, I was one big zombie. I had no mental power or energy to truly take good care off our pets anymore. Tom was more attached to my brother by then and I had the idea I had failed in raising him. He was doing hard getting attached to other people. What made it even worse, was that by September 2024, I had to go living in a care home in another place. Far from my parental home. So I barely got to see Tom anymore. He didn't like me and he was doing hard being gentle towards anyone else but my younger brother. Except that Tom loved to cuddle in my neck and purr very loud every often when I visited. But only when he got a bit used to my prescence in their surrounding. He wasn't my best friend. 

I didn't get to see him that much. I was working my ass off in Zaanstad at care homes and day care centres, only seeing my cat (Who had the paperworks changed to the name off my family back then, at first he was fully mine.) when I visited my family. He was doing well and adopted with care and love. Being friends with their other cats. It wasn't truly something to feel guilty over, it's just that I felt guilty about failing him. 

Tom had some issues with his liver recently. He had to get surgeries and medication he refused to take. He became more cuddly and attached after the surgeries. I don't know why, sometimes we see the light in the end, but it couldn't be helped: our cat died yesterday evening, and my family called me tonight he died yesterday. Waiting for my younger brother to have come home from work. He was his best friend and a perfect replacing cat-dad. I feel so sad over it. 

If I showed people a picture off Tom, they always said how beautifull he was. He was beautifull, a bit naughty, charming, and it's hard to have lost him. I wish I only would have been capable to take care off him better. But I never could and never could have done in the future. I was too sick. 

I thanked my brother for his good care off my cat, he did so perfectly. He was everything Tom could wish for. My brother is very sad about the loss. It's hard for this evening. 

This is my Tom, 

                                                             In memoriam, 2013-2024. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.   

Good morning at the 15th off January, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

Today it's hailing, cold, slippery and dark outside in the Netherlands. Perfect gloomy weather for Blue Monday. 

*

We have a week off snow ahead. It's going to be freezing at night. I hope you are all warm and safe and sound during this week. And let's hope energy prices won't shoot through the roof anymore due to cold and war. We need our central heathing more than ever these days. 

I've accidentally bitten my lips. It's quite a stain, so I won't be capable to wear 'grocery shopping lipstick.' today. Usually I don't wear much make-up, but for grocery shopping, it's mascara and a nude HEMA lipstick each week. 'Canal House Brick.' Which I purchased for it's funny name. It's a soft nude. But it works well on me, and I have been using it for quite a few years. It's remarkable how long lipstick goes with if you're sober and don't do it each week. 

Something in me wishes to look a little bit better during grocery shopping. If not for the attention off the supermarket manager, if not for the agreeable looks from fellow-millenial women who judge me when I face them, if not for the appreciation off self-scan staff, (Middle-adged ladies mainly, who check if I scanned everything.) then it's just for myself, but the appreciation from others in the supermarket, aside to my idea off myself being agreeable in the supermarket each week, make it worthit. Usually I tell you how I don't wear make-up, I don't know if I have told you about Canal House Brick lipstick before. appearently, the opinion off other people, no matter how small, still matters to me. But not on a daily base. I only wear a small amount off make-up on mondays if I don't have obligations. 

I apply my lipstick like a Chanel pro: lipbalm first, then lipstick, and then removing too much product from the sides with a cotton tip. It makes me look invincible, groomed and nice each week. But this week it will be just lipbalm, since I bit my lip and have a stain. I allready applied my mascara. Rest off the face is just make-up less. I don't know if it's in my favor not to wear lipstick today. I think Í'm just a monday morning costumer to the supermarket. As long as I don't wear summer clothes and Hawaï prints today, and simply pay for my groceries, I think they don't really care. To me personal it does matter a bit. Simply for my self-image. Maybe for now I should pretend not to care. I need those groceries anyway. Let's simply go for it, and hope they are all just as forgetfull as most people. Next week they are going to see me with lipstick again. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.    

Good evening at the 14th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was cold and gloomy with here and there an icy cold rainshower. 

*

Something got me up on my feet this evening. Usually I lay in bed pretty early, tired and sad. Trying to rest. But tonight something positive got me up again, it may seem silly, it may seem small, but it was the idea not to die too early and to be almost certain I'm going to live next half a year. 

It may sound strange. But sometimes I'm certain I'm going to die early. Due to medication, or cramp itches inside my head. But today, I'm certain I'm not going to die. 

The weather is still quite dreary, tomorrow it will be Blue Monday, and it's a negative overvieuw for the next couple off years. But at least I'm not going to die. It made me feel a tad more positive. Positive enough to get out off bed and start listening to music on YouTube and take a look on Pinterest this evening. And pour myself some tea. It may not sound like a lot, but the previous weeks, I have been in bed all the time in the evening. So to me, to be out on the couch like this, is quite something. 

I still lend to the negative. I'm not really positive minded at the moment and the general feeling is gloomy. I'm close to my period. But something told me I'm NOT going to die. I worry about that. The feeling is almost as positive as more light and summer. Strange as it may sound. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

 

Good evening at the 11th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today it's icy cold and cloudy in the Netherlands. 

*

Today was for swimming a few lapses in the local swimming pool. The first time since Christmas vacation. I felt glad I have done so. I purchased a new bathing suit which I could flaunt with a little during swimming. My intention with it was to make it 'well fitted.' Which is important for a fat lady. It fits me well, and it looks nice. I love to swim. 

Yesterday was for watching an all time favourite off mine, Howl's Moving Castle by Hayao Miyazaki and Studio Ghibli. I have loved that movie ever since I was 18. My younger brother would say: 'Oh no, not that movie again!!!' But we would still watch it anyway. Because I love it so much. I think I can feel with with the characters a bit more due to these times compared to the times when I first watched it. As if the threat off a new war and people hanging on to the classics and old fashioned stuff makes it more relatable. I still love that movie. I can recomend it to everyone. I'm glad I found out it's on Netflix 

Next week they forecasted a blizzard in the Netherlands on Wednesday. I feel a bit threated by the idea, but that's because I'm afraid I will slip and fall when the snow is there. I have to wear shoes with good grip. I'm lucky to own these. And sometimes there's nothing to do but to sit on the couch, pour myself a large cup off tea, turn on my favourite radio channel and simply sit it out. At least I can be gratefull I have a home to sit it out. It will also be the week off my period, so I should have everything I need for that stocked in the home. It's not much off a funny joke when there's a blizzard and you don't have that covered as a woman. And chocolate! Heavy snow during a period requires a lot off chocolate! At least it's the kind off day that almost forces us to take it easy if you don't have a job, not to go out and take it low-profile. Perfect for a period day. 

The Dutch Central Bank published a raming about the growth off our economy. I think it's too optimistic. It's not as positive as last year, but I believe it will be at minus for the entire year 2023, and a minus for this first quarter off a year. They spoke off an expectation off 0,3 % growth, but I have the idea it's at least -0,3% for 2023. Since every quarter was a minus. I think the raming for entire 2024 is on the optimistic side, since it predicts gowth. They should take count off a more negative scenario for this year. They still have the idea they talk about 'The Netherlands.' A strong and wealthy world economy, and it's supposed to grow each year. But this time they should take it down if they wish for a serious prediction for economic growth. I myself have the idea we talk abouth a growth mark off around -0,8% for this quarter off a year. The first quarter off a year for 2024. It's NOT positive. I may seem like a Negative Nancy to you, but I'm utmost realistic. If you care for growth marks, it's important to hold a realistic scenario to the people. But maybe I'm not realistic since this comes from visions, insights and intuition. And it's still not real for the high-educated economists off the Netherlands. But they should beware. Not because I personally would do something to them, but because this negativity is real. 

I don't know if anyone who matters to it is going to see it. or if it's going to be true. I just think we should all take count off a further shrinking economy. It's not going to do good for the prices. At least for this entire year. But there are going to be more sunny days, somehow, somewhere, in the future. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading. 

 

Good evening at the 9th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was a clear sky while freezing in the Netherlands. 

*

Most visions, voices, insights- No matter what you call it, point in the direction off 2026 for peace. February / March 2026. August that year we will certainly have peace. It takes three more winters from this one on. 

So, it's going to take some time. Maybe you will have to grid your teeth a bit harder, work a little bit more, or safe a little more money. Or re-wear your clothes a little longer. Live with relatives a little more due to costs you can't otherwise afford, But peace is going to be there within three years, and this war won't last forever. 

In here, I finally could set myself to washing my duvet and pillow and cleaning the house with some help, while actually being in a personal dip. The home is spic and span again. It's my personal pride to have a clean home. Despite today it was with help. The bed is perfectly clean again, (Including my teddy bear) And has a fresh duvet cover. Now, that is something great for today! Like I said, sometimes progress can't be measured in economical growth marks. (Though I think they will be low this year) But in these sort off things. As long as we make progress somehow, (See the blog I posted before about this) it's not too bad to have low economic growth marks. I think for my style off living, we made a whole centimeter on a scale off millimeters. I also took a shower and cleaned myself and put on clean PJ's this evening. Sometimes it's simply to clean a home to make personal progress. I didn't do so entirely myself, but it feels so nice. 💖 The cleaning fairy even helped to clean away the winter blues. It feels that nice in here. 

So, for now I can say we have to keep hope for the future. It's not  going to happen next week, but it's also not in 20 years we'll finally be at peace. It won't last forever, and there is a day after tomorrow. I believe in that. So keep your head held high. No matter what that means to you, try to stay realistic during these years, but don't lose hope. And clean your entire bed every once half a year, if you wish for even more well-ment advice, 😉because you deserve that. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading! 

     

Good evening at the 8th off January, 2024,

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was freezing and clear in the Netherlands. It was mildly freezing. 

*

After those dreary holidays, I was glad ordinairy Monday Morning groceries was there again. They took us grocery shopping at the local supermarket. It was very expensive, but I made it with my small budget today. The holidays weren't so great, it was good daily life witheld something positive. Finally I have groceries on stock again. I was a bit dependant on the grocery service these days. Since having Corona, and the holidays. But it was good to be out and on my feet again this monday.  

I'm still in a small dip. I could set myself to wash up the dishes a few days ago, but other than that, I'm not doing well. My mind is buisy these days. It's a bit unorganized, and I foresee diffrent outcomes to the war all the time. 

The best scenario is this very spring, during February / March, the worst case scenario possible is 2028. 2028 will really make the west cringe from suffering, and with us I think the entire world will suffer. But there is a possibility it can end this very spring, and people won't be so poor and desperate again. I can look into the future, but this time it has a few diffrent scenario's for us. Dependant on how things will turn out. Sometimes I see peace and wealth, but lately I have seen a poor and desperate Netherlands again. Especially in the poor areas where I live. People here have little money. The crisis is a disaster for them.  

I for myself get by, there's little room for extra's, but I can keep up thanks to Leviaan. The care organisation where I live. I think I will get by in the future, and I will make it. But for others, it can turn out to be disastrous, even more painfull than it already is. 

Offcourse this is not a third world country. We have a roof above our head, and we have food and to drink on the table. But the bills are over the moon and there is no money for extra's for most. The most fun parts are blasted off by the Russians for us. 

I wish there was a guardian angel for all off us who would stop the war, and make life acceptable and great for us all again. No more war! No more perverted powerplay. That would be the best and most positive outcome for everyone. The newspaper is still filled with crisis and war. As if people don't have enough on their mind already. I live in a small care home, surrounded by elderly people who die all the time. I'm a mental patient who is already doing hard from daily life. Life is already hard enough without war. I wish they would understand. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.   

        

Good evening at the 6th off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today was cold, gloomy and dreary in this part off the Netherlands. 

*

This morning I decided to sleep in a bit, instead off getting out very early, I decided to stay in bed and get back to bed again after they handed me my medicine. It was a good idea, to be in bed and rest did well. Especially when you're up early always, like me. 

I hope people will keep hope during this crisis. No matter how bad it's going to be. It's important to not let our head hang down and become desperate. No matter how high the costs. It's important to keep in mind there will be a day after tomorrow, and this crisis won't last forever. There is a time after this. A lot off people have to grid their teeth and take it more sober these days. Remember it's not just you, you are not alone, and it won't be forever. I don't know for how long I'm going to repeat it, but this war with Russia is not the end off the world. I hope you are strong and sane enough to keep that in mind. Without hope, we lose everything, and we better give it up to the Russians immediately. 

I have had coffee in my own flat today, and it did well against my winter dip. I'm a bit depressed these days. It's more persistent than I thought. But coffee helped. Science has it, coffee works well for your mood. But not more than 4 cups a day. It's stated that women who drink coffee, are more happy with life and less likely to commit suicide. I'm far from suicide. I love life too much, but this is to illustrate how well coffee works for your mood. So, yes, I dedicate to the coffee this afternoon I feel a bit better compared to earlier on. But that is for today. 

I took a shower this evening, and changed to PJ's. Today was a calm day. But I'm a psychiatric patient who needs her rest. Lately, I'm often tired. I got this hormonal cure which starts up a menstrual period. It also works with against my mood. I take it because my period doesn't come natural, and a woman needs it every three times a year. This is the first time this year I take it again. Maybe the gloomyness and the feeling to be in bed all the time comes from that. But coffee helps... an entire ditch off coffee! I took about 5 cups today. 

If I feel the urge to chocolate, at least I know where it comes from, and then I simply should have more patience with myself. This year is not much off a kickstart, but at least I'm not likely to crash this speedboat against a wall when I start it off slowly. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.     

Good morning at the 5th off January, 2024, 2.

 Good morning everyone, 

It's grey, cold and dreary outside this morning in the Netherlands. 

*

The Ukraine-Russia war and the crisis won't be over soon, we still have a few years off war ahead. I have been cheering too early about peace. Anything signed these days won't last, or is not in Europe's favor. It's likely to be an expensive scam if they think too straight on about it. 'Think a bit more crooked when you work with Russia.' That's what I got to say about it. 

Things will be even more expensive, and it will last for some time. We're going to be poor in Western Europe. But we take it with style. Vintage classics are going to help us deal with it. Like they already do, but even a bit more. I love it. I always have been a vintage loving girl, but this era (The modern '20's) is going to dwell in it. It's not so bad for an old soul like mine. It's nostalgic and romantic, and not too expensive. Just what we need. 

anything too sweet is not going to be it during these years. We need to fight and stand firm, we can't be prissy. 

I had a night off bad sleep where I could not catch sleep. I'm having trouble sleeping well these days, and sleep untill morning. I wake up too early in the morning, and this night it felt like I haven't slept at all. 

And I'm in a winter dip. It's not a depression, but a 'The holidays went off early.' - dip. And it's dark, cold and dreary outside all the time here. It's forecasted to get freezing this weekend, even more cold. January IS a dark month when you have soaked up too little light during the Yule period. Just too bad, now I have to deal with that this entire dark winter. I could try to seek more light by burning more candles. Maybe that is going to help a little. Light, warmth, cozyness. Something to pick me up these days. And it is pretty hard. 

Something that does work for me, is that I started talking. I chit-chat and have nice conversations with people at de Boed, where I used to be quiet all the time. Real life just wasn't the place for me to talk, but it's pretty inviting for me to open up these days. I'm more off an 'internet and paper.' kind off girl who does hard making real life friends. To talk is important, we all need to give air to our feelings and experiences. Every person needs it. I'm just overlooking it and choke things in most off the time, while actually, I need it most. But I do / did hard with it. De Boed becomes so much off a better place when I talk with people and express my opinions and feelings. Much better! To talk helps, like the cliche says. 

Coffee, the newspaper and conversations are all very healthy for human well-being in my opinion, especially in the morning. (If you can set yourself to talking) being social is human. It's better, and I feel like I need it these days. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good morning at the 5th off January, 2024.

 Good morning everyone, 

Today was rainy, cold and dreary among these streets in Zaandijk, a small town in the Netherlands. 

*

Some time ago, I decided to start following crisis-fashion. I'm mud-fat, but it doesn't look bad on me. My hair is dyed a cool blonde and it's even and shoulder length, my eyebrows are natural and thick, and I wear little to no make-up. That's for my face. In my case, it comes with thick old glasses. And no one can see my hard working purity, but I'm not a working woman, I'm a client. Most young women from health care staff look like this. All their hair long and natural, their eyebrows thick and their make-up natural and faces pure. The hard working work-force off nowadays crisis Netherlands, am I right? I think it's cool, and I also want to be part off it. Though I look a bit out off tune, since the average woman who does that has a nice posture most off the time. They look natural, pure and hard working. It's awesome to be like that these days, and they look like no pretence. I like the 'In your face.' and 'honest.' kind off beauty standard that comes with it. Since we're stuck with this crisis for quite a while, I know we're going to see it this enitre era. Pure, strong, and only a red lip when they want something extra. They are the average ladies who take care off this country nowadays. Usually, they wear black. Plain, black clothes like simple t-shirts and pants. And cool sneakers and daily wear jewelry and scents. When one off them wears make-up, it's often very simple, natural and elegant. It's not the blonde snob that sets the tone for fashion nowadays, and it's to my liking, with it's 'minimal make-up' and natural hair tone trend. 

I'm no work-force, but the trend is just too awesome and too characteristic for these times to ignore. I adjust berry red and dark green to the colour scale, and cool boots, and previous year's sweaters. (Which are colourfull, I admit, but it's to save out on clothes.) It's not too pricey, it's perfect. It doesn't even require make-up on a daily base. Which I'm in for. Otherwise I would have seemed ungroomed, nowadays I'm in fashion. I have nothing against myself when I follow these trends and this fashion style. They make it rock. Somehow they remind me off the old fashioned metal grumpy but then as an acceptable female with that long, natural hair. (Grumpy is my nickname for frele natural metalheads.) 

Except that these women lack the personality that comes with a Grumpy. Still I think this fashion trend rocks. I'm too over with Grumpy to be positive about them, but these work-force trend women deserve nothing but praise. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.  

Good evening at the 1st off January, 2024.

 Good evening everyone, 

Today has been clear and cold in the Netherlands. It's been even sunny for a short while, before tomorrow the rain hits in again according to the weather forecasts. 

*

We started another year with hopes, promises and dreams for the future. I hope you can make your dreams come true, and you and yours are blessed and healthy this entire year. 

I have been tired today, I have been in bed from 13.00 PM untill 16.00 PM, and I relaxed and tried to sleep. I still feel somewhat tired from Corona. The 1st off January is usually a day to relax and sleep in a bit. I had a rushy morning, with medication and breakfast, coffee and lunch. But I decided on to skip de Boed's afternoon coffee to have a rest today. Sometimes de Boed demands too much from us. But we are free wheter we go there or not. So, rest it was this afternoon. The cold invites people even more to stay in, and be sleepy and rest after a short night off sleep. Well, on the positive side, I did nothing bad with my time by staying in and sleeping. 

My New Year's eve was a bit lonesome, I have spend it in and watched fireworks from out my window. The fireworks in this neighbourhood, poor as it is, left nothing to wish for. For a noisy neighbour, it makes me wonder what they do it from, money-wise, but the fireworks looked amazing. It was a great free show to watch. Provided by my neighbours. 

It's as if everything, ever since the day after Christmas, wants me to live as sober as possible again. No more Christmas after Christmas, no cozy holiday vacation feeling, no left overs, but dry, boring and sober- cold turkey like Christmas only belongs once a year, and the soberness prepares me for the rest off the year. Otherwise, there would have been a top 2000 best music off all time to listen to, or a TV show, or something else great, but I was just too tired and wrapped up in daily life again. I even haven't watched the New Year's day concert today. So sadly enough, no New Year's traditions for me this year, just a few snacks last night, and fireworks from out my window. Maybe I should skip the New Year's resolution tradition either, but my resolution is to try to keep on being clean and keeping the house clean. Keep on going the way it is, and health care staff is going to get angry at me if I don't. I better keep to it. This morning, at January 1st, I cleaned my own toilet and emptied thrash bins, for example. And I think I better stick to the monday 'Clean the home' routine. 

So the holidays are over in the Netherlands, we go back to a period off cold and dreary slomberness this week. I hope I can make it through. Maybe I should see what will be going on this period, and see how to react to it. The drearyness off this period makes me feel so tired. It's gloomy and depressing. Maybe I should have a little patience with myself and my winter blues. Give myself time. Usually my winter blues, if I catch one, lasts untull March. Untill spring time begins. This blunt ending off the holiday season makes it so bad. Hopefully I can find something against it. 

Allright, that's about it for now- 

Thank you for reading.