Your trauma isn't your fault, but going on and healing from it IS your responsibility.

 Good evening everyone, 

The sun goes down but it's still visible. it's around 21.30 P.M and it's still lively and bright outside. I love it. 

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Getting myself educated about schizophrenia wasn't a bad thing. I started to understand more off what I was going through was somewhat about and I think there should be more educational material available about this on YT or the internet in general. It helps me. I like the way it makes me understand more about myself. Insights work to improve myself on points. 

I'm someone who believes in self-improvement. I heard it saying somewhere, but I forgot where: 

'Your trauma isn't your fault, but going on and healing from it IS your responsibility.' 

I never saw it that way. I just went on and on in life without the idea off having, or needing to have, it in my own two hands. Schizophrenia is a brain disease which can't be cured according to science, but by knowing more and realizing what is part off it and how they deal with it, I started to understand more and I'm wishing to try to make more off my life by trying to work on those parts which I knew where there, but which wheren't named or made clear to me, and made understandable to myself by me. Know yourself. That's an important part off life. After you realize you aren't an endless victim to circumstances, you can start to build yourself up again and try to stand stronger. We can take a look in our mirrors, and give it a try to improve ourselves and our lives. It's deep psychological shit, but I need this. Dwelling in the victim mode leads to nowhere. It's even annoying to me from a certain point. So that's what I'm going to try: Get up and cure. Not get up and fight again because that mainly leads to nowhere either. I need to get up and regain good energy. If dragonflies can do it, then why can't I do it?

Allright, that's about it. 

Thank you for reading.